A
male
age
18-21,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I've realised I lie a lot and I don't want to I don't know why I do it. There are a few big lies i've told. I've cheated on my partner and not told them - I regret it, hugely, I love them, it was a mistake at the beginning of are relationship but because of those reasons i've kind of justified the lie. When I was younger I told my friends I had lost my virginity, to stop them teasing and to fit it, again because of those reason i've justified the lie. But, what i've noticed recently is im lying for the sake of it, a friend phoned today to ask if i wanted to go for a drunk so i lied and said i was going to visit an aunty - it's not that i didn't want to see her because we arranged to meet up on wednesday. A few friends phoned and text over the weekend and i didn't answer and then text them back today telling them i had left my phone at a friends - there was no reason for me to this at all. I don't know why i keep doing it, the bigger lies (the first two) i feel like i could never tell the truth but i dont like these lies being a part of my life.
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drunk, lost my virginity, teasing, text Reply to this Question |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, quiet-echo  + ♥, writes (3 November 2009):
 The most common reasons to lie are
1. to avoid accountability/punishment/retribution
2. to gain something you would not gain by being truthful
3. as an act of rebellion
Consistent lying reflects a view of relationships with others as being somehow exploitive.
As the previous poster has suggested, frequent deception on this scale merits some professional assistance. A good therapist should help you gain insights into your own motives.
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