A
female
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*miee
writes:heya,I can't help it, I find it really hard to put my trust into guys, like the guy I'm currently dating. I get extreamly worried and jealous that he is going off me because of his msn screen name one part said "lv u 2 princess" I thought hang on he never calls me princess i wonder who its about, so I asked him and made a joke of it and he said it was a girl from college messing around. But I find it hard to believe that he's messing around because he never puts anything like that about me. The problem is we were both acting normal earlier on in the day accept he put less kisses and what-not but I didn't think much of that at all. But I've never had a relationship in the past where I have been able to fully trust a guy because they've done something to end it in tears. Could some one please help me find out for sure if he does have feelings for some one else and help me put my trust in him a little more because that could be why im so suspicious. thank you xXx
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male
reader, David Lewis +, writes (13 June 2006):
 Well at least you have now found out.There is nothing worse than a cheat, some can be forgiven in certain circumstances, some can't.You need to just walk away from him and find someone who really cares about you.You will soon gain trust when you find the right guy.Best of luck, you deserve itx
A
female
reader, amiee +, writes (13 June 2006):
amiee is verified as being by the original poster of the question infact soz dnt worry i found out this moarnin that i was right not to trust him all of a sudden hes not intrested now :S thanks for the advice on trusting my instincs you were right. xXx
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A
female
reader, amiee +, writes (13 June 2006):
amiee is verified as being by the original poster of the questionjsut to add to it weve talked about cheating before and how its wrong and that so its confused me even more how should i confront him about it?
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A
female
reader, Hopeful +, writes (13 June 2006):
 I think it is important to go with your gut instincts here. It does sound odd and if it sounds odd to you, I would do something about it.
In terms of trust, this can be a big issue but I believe that trust needs to be earned by your partner. You don't have to trust someone 100% the minute you start dating them. Think about a teacher or a boss or a neighbour, you don't just instantly trust them 100%, you begin a relationship and as it grows, comfort, respect and trust will grow (hopefully!).
So don't beat yourself up about not trusting people 100%. It's ok, it doesn't make you a bad person, it just means that you need to be in a situation where you build up trust.
Unfortunately, not all partners are trustworthy and just because you feel suspicious doesn't mean that you don't trust guys in general. I was suspicious of an ex but I thought by questioning it I would show him that I didn't trust him and in the end I found out he was up to all sorts behind my back.
Since then I have dated lots of guys who are decent men and believe me, its much easier to build up that trust with decent people.
One day you will meet someone who you really feel comfortable and happy with and a really trusting relationship will grow and you will be more trusting of him. Trust will come much easier when it is someone who is really right for you.
In the meantime, if you are suspicous, don't beat yourself up, do something about and get to the bottom of it and if you really don't trust this guy, give him the flick. Always listen to your gut instinct on these things.
Good luck.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2006): I used to be just like you. I could never trust guys. Until I met my new boyfriend :) I can tell by the way he looks at me that I mean a lot to him and I know he doesn't want to hurt me. If you are thinking that your boyfriend is cheating then that very well could be. That luv u princess thing is kinda fishy. I say always trust your intuition, if you have this uneasy feeling then you could be right. Sooner or later the truth will come out. Good Luck* :)
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