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I have the biggest crush on a guy at work!!

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Question - (2 July 2007) 19 Answers - (Newest, 12 December 2007)
A female United Kingdom age 36-40, *itch-fire writes:

I've fallen for a guy at work, we get on really well as friends, we have loads in common, and his family like me. Only problem is he has a girlfriend, and I'm friends with her. I would never do anything while he's still dating her, I'm not that kind of person but I can't stop thinking of him. They were having problems not long back and that's when we started getting closer. I have no idea what to do. My crushes have NEVER been this big before!

View related questions: at work, crush, has a girlfriend

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A female reader, witch-fire United Kingdom +, writes (12 December 2007):

witch-fire is verified as being by the original poster of the question

witch-fire agony auntThis is sorted. Thanks for advise, but I just thought that I should move on, he and his girlfriend really do belong together.

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A female reader, witch-fire United Kingdom +, writes (8 July 2007):

witch-fire is verified as being by the original poster of the question

witch-fire agony auntthanks im not a bad person really. i just really like this guy.

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A female reader, YummyMummy United Kingdom +, writes (7 July 2007):

YummyMummy agony auntAlright :)

xxxxxxx

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A female reader, witch-fire United Kingdom +, writes (7 July 2007):

witch-fire is verified as being by the original poster of the question

witch-fire agony auntI would if she would listen. they're a very outspoken family. Anyway I wouldn't want her to find out that I like him. She is bound to tell him and that's something I want to keep to myself until better times.

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A female reader, YummyMummy United Kingdom +, writes (5 July 2007):

YummyMummy agony auntOk. So you're not going to interfere. I would also chat to his mum and ask her to stop interfering. It's his life and he won't thank his mum for what she is doing.

xxxxxxx

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A female reader, witch-fire United Kingdom +, writes (5 July 2007):

witch-fire is verified as being by the original poster of the question

witch-fire agony auntwell im not going to forget him but im not going to interfere anymore- if that's what you call it.

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A female reader, flower girl United Kingdom +, writes (4 July 2007):

flower girl agony auntYou are trying to justify what you are doing and it is clear that no one is going to agree with you, the only time that will happen is if you say you will walk away and forget him.

Take care.xx.

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A male reader, eddie Canada +, writes (4 July 2007):

eddie agony auntGood, don't then. Mission accomplished.

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A female reader, witch-fire United Kingdom +, writes (4 July 2007):

witch-fire is verified as being by the original poster of the question

witch-fire agony auntI'm trying not to do anything.

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A male reader, eddie Canada +, writes (4 July 2007):

eddie agony auntOK, so his mother interferes....and now, so do you. You said you weren't that kind of person. You are apparently and you're muddying the waters. Call it what it is.

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A female reader, witch-fire United Kingdom +, writes (4 July 2007):

witch-fire is verified as being by the original poster of the question

witch-fire agony auntShe already does interfere and he knows it. I told him what she thought of me.

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A female reader, YummyMummy United Kingdom +, writes (3 July 2007):

YummyMummy agony auntI agree with eddie- ally for what?

Yes it might be handy having her on your side WHEN and IF you start dating this guy. But this guy isn't going to thank his mum for butting in to his relationship with his current girlfriend.

xxxxxxxx

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A male reader, eddie Canada +, writes (3 July 2007):

eddie agony auntYou are that kind of person as noted by the fact you're counting his mother as a powerful ally....Ally for what?

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A female reader, witch-fire United Kingdom +, writes (3 July 2007):

witch-fire is verified as being by the original poster of the question

witch-fire agony auntThe thing is its weird because his parents like me more than his current girlfriend. I don't know how much he listens to his mum but I think I have a powerful ally.

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A female reader, YummyMummy United Kingdom +, writes (2 July 2007):

YummyMummy agony auntAs you have said you wont do anything while he's with his girlfriend. All you can really do is be a friend and sit back and wait. Maybe drop suttle hints to him you like him :)

xxxxxxx

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A male reader, kenny United Kingdom + , writes (2 July 2007):

kenny agony auntAlot of affairs/relationships stem from the workplace. We spend on average of eight hours a day with co-workers, this is more time than we spend with potential partners. Its good you say that you would never do anything while he is still dating her, this is the right thing to do. If anything is going to happen it has to be when his current relationship is well and truly over.

I know what its like to develop a crush for a colleague, im crushing on a female co-worker bigtime at the moment, and she is all i think about.

What i will say is that were you to get with this guy one of you might have to consider leaving. Office dating is great while things are sweet, but when/if things go sour then it can be very arkward having to still seeing him every day.

Good luck x

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A female reader, flower girl United Kingdom +, writes (2 July 2007):

flower girl agony auntWe always want what we can't have, just try and stay clear of him for a while and get out loads and try and meet different people, and i applaude you for having morals and not trying anything on.

Take care.xx.

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A male reader, eddie Canada +, writes (2 July 2007):

eddie agony auntYou should mind your business until he's single. Everything you do is influenced by your attraction to him.

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A female reader, beth88 United Kingdom +, writes (2 July 2007):

beth88 agony auntWow... Ironically, this is similar to how my bloke and I got together this past Spring.

Three questions:

1.) Does he feel the same way about you?

2.) Do he and the girlfriend still have problems?

3.) Who's blame do the problems fall upon the most?

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