A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Iv had sex with this girl who was a sort of friend 3 times now. It was only supposed to be no strings sex and it still is for her. problem is i'm falling for her and not sure what i should do.she said at the start that she didn't want a relationship but i can already feel myself getting disappointed when shes too busy to see me etc. you know, those feelings you get when your falling for someone.what should i do? i like her and i don't want to stop seeing her. its fun but i don't want to get hurt.any ideas? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, natmarie +, writes (1 August 2012):
 I think you should let her know how you feel, in whatever way by talking, email- whatever you are comfortable with asap. You may be plesantly surprised as she may feel the same. If she doesn;t , at least you have cleared the air by being honset about your feelings. Tell her what you just told us: eg: you get a bit disspointed tec. If she does not reciprocate, at least you know and cna move on before you get hurt anymore, but I would risk it and let her know . If she does ot feel the same, try and distance yourslef asap, or you could get really hurt if you continue to sleep with her. Let us know how you get on, and good luck. Do the right thing by yourself and look after your heart.
A
male
reader, Mosaic  +, writes (5 June 2012):
 i would like to know myself..im in a similar situation. except we did not talk about relationships before hand. it was never agreed apon if it was FWB or NSA. now i got to find out..i feel your pain man. and i hope someone comes up with an answer for both of us.
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A
male
reader, N91 +, writes (5 June 2012):
 Talking from personal experience, end it NOW. It WILL get worse.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2012): You need to stop seeing her if you feel this way. There's no way you can continue and put your feelings to one side, its getting complicated for you and it will only get worse. It will hurt your feelings if you stop seeing her but it will hurt you more seeing her while you feel like this and know she doesn't feel the same for you. And what if you do decide to continue with it and she decides to call things off if she becomes interested in someone else and wants more with him? It will rip your heart out.
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A
female
reader, akanet  +, writes (4 June 2012):
Take the plunge.
Tell her because even if you don't, it might as well all go down from there for your emotions. I think the highest hope you have is to confess and either accept the rejection, move on, or surprise, no rejection.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2012): I've had some experience with this kind of situation a few times.
The only thing for you to do is end it. There will be one of two outcomes from ending it:
1) she wont care too much, and in this case she was never worth it and just using you
2) she might miss you too when you're not there to call on and realise there might be other feelings there. Girls can rarely have a purely sex relationship, but she might not realise how she truly feels until you're not there to call on whenever she needs some affection.
Either way its best to end it now. Dont carry on and end up feeling used. Believe me theres a girl out there who would love a guy like you so theres no point wasting your time.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (4 June 2012):
 "FWB" often ends up as you have experienced.... with one of the participants "falling for" the other......
IF you and she cannot reconcile the mismatch of affections, then the FWB must fail... and you must find another girl to fool around with.... You are not alone...
Good luck....
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A
female
reader, jinxx  +, writes (4 June 2012):
 I think the best thing for you to do, would be to end your arrangement. Whether or not you tell her why, though, is up to you.
If you continue to see her, and hide your feelings, it is almost inevitable that you will get hurt.
Maybe she feels the same. You never really know unless you ask, right? Good luck
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2012): If she doesn't want a relationship then there's really no point in carrying on with the FWB thing. You're only going to get more and more hurt the longer it carries on.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (4 June 2012):
 if she does not feel the same as you, then the best thing you can do for both of you is to end the friendship.
FWB rarely works... someone always gets hurt... in this case YOU.
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