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I have a crush on my boss. Does he like me?

Tagged as: Crushes<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (20 October 2015) 4 Answers - (Newest, 22 October 2015)
A female India age 30-35, anonymous writes:

So I have a crush on my boss and I have this feeling he has it too.Signs-His eyes shine when he talks to me.Whenever he is around me,he tries to look at me.His friends at work are sweet to me.I have come to this new company unfortunately with baggage from the past and So initially I told me Supervisor that I am careful about making friends bcoz there was a crazy guy friend in my past.Chinese whispers-She told her colleagues(including my boss)that I don't want to Make Friends.That same day there was a Meeting with him where he kept indirectly saying how we shud talk to ppl,make friends,etc.etc.Such a topic is strange at Work.Anywayz,he also has this habit of talking indirectly.Once he was joking around N I politely smiled at his jokes,So he said U've turned Red.But I guess he is already Married.If So,then wats happenning.I don't want to waste my time.I also have this reputation at Work of being Someone who is very honest and straightforward which is true to some extent but not in an extreme form the way people perceive.I know he has a certain perception about me which is not completely true.Another thing he does is If am around he'll wait and let me walk infront of him.I decided to observe when he's not aware but he doesn't do this with other women.He once asked me if I was trying to hypnotise him.He always stares at me.If I am talking to clients he'll stand behind and listen.His body language is subtle but am very good at reading BL.He'll breathe whenever he sees me.I know we have a hell lot in common and I know he knows that.So whats happening here??

View related questions: at work, crush, crush on my boss, my boss

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A female reader, femmenoir Australia +, writes (22 October 2015):

femmenoir agony auntYou and your boss are simply flirting and this is never a healthy, nor good thing to do in the workplace.

You do not wish to ruin and destroy your reputation, so salvage your reputation right now, whilst you still can and keep your boss at arms length.

Don't make eye contact with him and don't make small talk with him.

Show him what a professional you are and maybe, he will learn something constructive from you!

To be brutally honest, from all you've stated, your boss sounds quite the male flirt and you obviously like the attention.

You go to work to make a living and to keep a roof over your head, so if you wish to engage in flirtatious behaviour, do it, but not within your workplace, it's way too risky and so not worth it.

I have had this happen to me, more times than i can remember, when i was younger and believe me, it hardly ever works out for the very best.

Let go of these feelings, thoughts and your internal, dreamy fantasies.

Move on and find a man that is perfectly suited to you, outside of the office, because God forbid, if you and he had a falling out, you'd be history there!

Remember, prevention is better than cure, so be pre-prepared and pre-armed and "prevent".

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A male reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (21 October 2015):

olderthandirt agony auntSounds like your run-of-the mill perv to me

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A female reader, Tisha-1 United States +, writes (21 October 2015):

Tisha-1 agony auntHe's married.... what do you hope happens here?

He's your boss. He might be an attractive person.

If you don't want to waste your time, then what's the point in spending this much time wondering if your married boss likes you?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (20 October 2015):

If you think your boss is a married man, why are you asking all these questions?

You are only there to work, and you should keep your romantic concerns out of your workplace.

How many times do you read this same subject in DC; where people are wondering if co-workers and colleagues are attracted to them? The answer is the same. Don't poop where you eat! Your job is how you pay the bills! Find a man away from your job!

Where will you work if you have a spat or fight with a co-worker you're involved with romantically? If you can't check your romantic feelings at the door when you enter a workplace; most likely you won't when you start fighting a lover/coworker. You'll put all your personal-life on display! You'll feel awkward and it will effect your work performance. Which is the only reason they pay you to be there!

Your pursuit of romance should be practiced exclusively in your private-life. Not where people can whisper and gossip.

Stay a arm's distance away from your boss, and treat him like you'd treat your grandfather. A man to be respected, not to date!!! Keep your stares to yourself, behave as your parents would want you to behave. As a respectable strong woman. Not the bosses bimbo or plaything.

One bad misstep and you might get yourself fired. Especially if he is a married man! Or, be fired because his wife finds out through an anonymous tip you're flirting with the boss! Your supervisor should only know what you need to perform at your best. That's it! She/he seems to talk behind your back. Things you've said in confidence.

Oh, as for your supervisor? Stop discussing personal things about yourself. Only for it to be run by the boss under discussion. That's back-stabbing you. Keep matters about your personality and quirks to yourself. Show them nothing but how professional and astute you are. You will be psychologically profiled if they think there's something wrong with you.

It's all about work, and your qualifications. That's all they need to know about you. Be polite, professional, and friendly to your co-workers. That's enough.

If they find too many personality-flaws; one of two things may happen. The boss will play you like a cheap tart, and then fire you; or they will think you are not mentally stable enough to maintain your position, and replace you.

All he needs to like about you is your work-ethic, qualifications and productivity. If he likes you as a person, that's a plus.

Don't put yourself in the position to be exploited; or used for any purpose other than what you were hired for.

You should know better by now. You're educated, and have had previous work experience.

You are coming off unbelievably naive for someone nearly thirty years old!

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