A
female
age
30-35,
*oRnfused
writes:Ive had alot of sex, but ive NEVER had an orgasm with a guy. I think Ive had an orgasm while touching myself, but even then I was only rubbing my clit...and there was no "cum". Did it count as an orgasm or was it just me thinking I had one!?And why dont I get any pleasure out of sex?? Ive thought about the possibility of being a-sexual, but i do think guys are hot etc...Im really confused!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Fee-Fee +, writes (13 January 2009):
 If you are asexual, it doesn't mean you can't be *physically* attracted to men, it's about being *sexually* attracted to men.
There is just one thing that needs a bit of clarification ... do you:
a) enjoy sex, but find it frustrating/have lost interest because you can't orgasm or:
b) enjoy looking at fit men, enjoy their company, but find yourself disinterested in actually *having* sex.
If it's b), then being a-sexual is a possibility.
If it's a), then there is a whole plethora of possibilities to choose from.
Tell us what you reckon, and we'll take it from there!
Fee
A
female
reader, sexylette  +, writes (13 January 2009):
 i had the same problem . i had sex all the time and never had an orgasm. i had had an orgasm before but it was while masturbating and that was from touching my clit. so i talked to my partner about that and now while having sex we'll find a position that he can rub my clit so that i can reach orgasm. and you do not HAVE to have a orgasm to have great sex.!! you can have great sex with-out having an orgasm.!! so my suggestion is tell the person that your having sex with that you would like it if they would rub your clit while having sex. try that if it dosnt work then try a position where his penis rubs against your clit during sex instead of him doing it.!!
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A
female
reader, lacexoxo22 +, writes (13 January 2009):
 Your young and it's going to take time to realize what will get you there and what won't. Being female has it's up and downs and sometimes sex is where the "gray area" begins. Some of us can have multiple orgasms and some of us will prpbably never have one, or have very few. The only advice I can give you is try EVERYTHING! Every sexual position you can think of, gels, lotions, vibrators, etc. You said you thought you might of had one when you were touching yourself, you more then likely did, so try that...next time your having sex, just take it upon yourself to "help yourself". There's nothing wrong with that, sometimes you need that little extra clit stimulation! I know I've had to "help myself" a few times :-) Good luck hope this helps.
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