A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I have been involved with a guy on and off for about 3 years now! I was completely besotted with him and because I loved him I just let him treat me bad - like he only ever used me for money,sex now and then etc etc... Anyway one day last week I decided I wasn't gonna give in to his demands for money - and as expected - he went off in a huff - no appreciation for what I'd already given him!The question is - will this just antagonise him more? Should I just start ignoring him until he goes away or give in to him? (As deep down I still care about him and I don't want the situation to turn nasty..)
View related questions:
money Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Moo's Mum  +, writes (12 September 2011):
 Tell him you have decided it's best for you both to go your seperate ways and stand firm on that. You owe him nothing.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 September 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for your replies! - I know that he IS using me - but I just don't know what to do for the best when he next gets in touch!
I just hope things will work out for the best!
...............................
A
female
reader, chickpea2011  +, writes (11 September 2011):
 Hi,
You are aware of your situation. You know he uses you for his own advantage, money, sex, etc. You shouldn't ask us " I feel he's using me" you are being used. Sorry, we both know it's true, so why are you still with him after 3 years? Not only, he's using you, he's selfish, and ungrateful.
You are not happy. He's rude to you, why can't you just walk away? Love him and care for him? Love is not enough... You deserve better, someone that will love, respect you, appreciate you. Pls, you already waste to much of your life on him, do what's right, and best for you. Find the strengh go walk away, never look back'
Hope you make the right decision.
Good luck
...............................
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (11 September 2011):
 Well, as Tennisstar says, you feel you are being used because you ARE being used. If you give him money he sticks around, if you don't he gets mad and distances himself, and if this is not using people I don't know what else "using" would look like.The question is, do you want to be used ? Do you like to be used ? Then carry on as usual. Pay him what he wants and that will secure you is temporary devotion- till the next time. If you want someone to like you and appreciate you for yourself just the way you are, regardless of what he can get out of you , then clearly this is not him, and you'd be wise to get rid of him before you deplete not only your wallet but also your self- esteem.
...............................
A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (11 September 2011):
 It's evident you're being used. What's disturbing is you're aware of it and allowing it to happen!
You may care about him, hence why you give him $, but he could really care less about you.
If you stop giving him what he wants ($ and sex) then he will leave you alone and move onto the next woman who will give into his demands.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 September 2011): try to read 'it is callled a break up because it is broken' by greg behrent.. i think i got the spelling all wrong.. good luck..
...............................
A
female
reader, Moo's Mum +, writes (11 September 2011):
To me that is a big red flag. Be very very careful about this guy. Turn all your spidey senses on and proceed with the utmost caution.
...............................
|
