A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I am a 23-year old girl from a very good family.I am completing my education from a very reputed college in India.My problem is that years back , when I was in grade 11 in school, I had this huge crush on my classmate. He was cute,friendly but a hard-core flirt, but still i fell head over heels in love with him.Later, he proposed to me and we started going out. We went out for around 5 months but one day I got to know that he was a cheat who was two-timing me. When I confronted him , he abused me and left me. I was shattered and was left in tears. 1 months later , my father got transferred and i never saw him again and tried to forget him. Now there is this very sweet guy in my college. Our families know each other. He is brilliant,decent,well mannered and from a very affluent family.He recently proposed to me. My family was very happy and asked me to say yes. But i was unable to forget my first love and deep inside i has this fear that sameer(my fiance) will leave me too , just like my ex-boyfriend. But when he assured that he will love me till his last breath , I said yes. Unfortunately , on my engagement day , I found out that my ex-boyfriend is my fiance's very close family friend. Ever since , my ex-bf has been threatening me and forcing me to sleep woth him. One day when I was in the parking lot , he tried to kiss me but I ran away. Then again , he came to my room and tried to undress me. When I slapped him , he started threatening me that he will spread malice rumours about me and sameer will break off his engagement with me. Though even in school I never slept or kissed my ex-bf he is saying that still he will tell everyone that we have slept together once , and as a result my engagement will be called off. I am very scared , I have started loving my fiance and I can;t afford to lose him.What to do ? Please help !!!
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female
reader, momo4eva77  +, writes (2 February 2009):
nvr been in this position but if i were i wud do this:
- tell ur current fiance bout ur ex
- tell ur fiance that he is abusing u nd threatning me that he will tell ur whole family that i slept with him which i havnt
its not technically lying but expanding the truth. try to do that i hope it helps. good luck !!!!!! :)
A
male
reader, The old Man? +, writes (2 February 2009):
 Tell your fiance' what is going on!
Just be honest with him.
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A
female
reader, RunsWithScissors +, writes (2 February 2009):
Your ex sounds like a very abusive, selfish, evil person. There's just no other way to put it. Google the term "narcissist" and you will see a description of this guy. My advice is to talk to your fiance and tell him that this guy has been trying to blackmail you into having sex with him by threatening to lie about your reputation. Assure your fiance that you kept yourself pure for him, but that you're afraid of his harassment and are concerned for both your physical and mental well-being. If your fiance loves you he will protect you and believe you.
You are allowed to stand up for yourself, the truth is on your side so don't be afraid. Stand up and be proud of yourself...you've done the right things so don't let anyone tear you down. And by no means should you give into this ex because he's just trying to bring you down to his level and will surely tell anyone and everyone.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2009): be honest and spill it before he does.
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