A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey, I'm underage and I'm not planning to have sex till I'm at least 16 with the right guy at the right time. So that's not a problem.But when I do, I'm worried.First, I'm worried about getting undressed. What do boys think about pubic hair? Is it best to leave it, shave it all off or just trim it a little? My skin is soft and I keep care of it, but I have lots of bumps and lumps on my skin in places like my upper arms and thighs that feel a bit grizzly, is that ok? Will I sweat when I have sex, what about body ouder? And then, I would'nt know what to do. I'm very shy, so I'm worried that when the time comes I'm just going to freeze and not do or say anything. What if I'm really bad at it?How do I know when it's over? I've nevr had an orgasim, how would I know when I've had one?Once I've done it once, am I expected to do it regulary?I know I'll use a condom, but can I still catch STD's even when I use it? How can I stop things like it splitting?Sorry for all the questions, but I really want to know. :)
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, TasteofIndia  +, writes (6 September 2007):
 Hey sweetness,
It's okay to have questions! I'm glad you're waiting for the right guy, and I'm also glad that you're educating yourself so that you won't make any mistakes.
As for most of your questions, well - sex kind of just happens and you figure it out as you go along. Yeah, you might get sweaty... just throw on some deodorant beforehand and you should be fine. There's always a little bit of an odor after things are done, but that's just the smell of sex (and it's not just coming from you, it's coming from you both).
As for pubic hair, it's like asking "what hair color do boys like best?" - some guys like pubic hair natural, some like it trimmed, some like it shaved... personally, I just think it's best to trim it up, keep it neat.
If you are having sex with the guy, there is little chance that he will notice any "bumps and lumps" on your skin. Trust me, he'll be pretty much be thrilled with your body no matter what it looks like. Boys love a naked woman and it doesn't matter if there are little flaws. Guys just aren't that detail-oriented. He won't notice, I swear.
You'll know when it's over. It's usually over (unfortunately) when the guy comes (a.k.a. has an orgasm). If you haven't had YOUR turn to orgasm yet, maybe he'll help you out orally until you do come.
To get to know your body better, one of these days you should start masturbating. That's a good and safe way to get to know yourself sexually without getting any guy (or risk of STD's or pregnancy) involved. Then you'll know what it feels like to have an orgasm.
Once you've done it once, you shouldn't be expected to do it regularly. That's a decision you should make for yourself, if you like it - go ahead and keep doing it whenever you get in the mood, but if you're not too keen, you don't have to continue to have sex. You can say, "that was great... let's wait a little longer.". When you have sex, how you have sex and who you have it with is a decision that ONLY you should make. Never feel uncomfortable. If you're feeling uncomfortable, it'll be bad sex.
As for STD's, it's possible you can still catch them if you don't use the condom right... I would recommend also going on birth control - just so you really don't have to worry about that. Talk to your partner, before you have sex, both of you should go to Planned Parenthood and just have a physical done to make sure you're all healthy.
I will leave you with some websites that might do a better job of answering your questions than me:
http://www.clitical.com
That's a website devoted to female masturbation and sex.
And then for general sex questions:
http://www.teensource.org/
http://www.scarleteen.com/
http://www.sexetc.org/
These are all great sites that will help you get some questions answered.
You sound like a sweet, wonderful, curious and SMART girl. Keep making smart decisions and I hope you get all your answers.
Best of luck, sweetness!!
xxIndia
A
female
reader, Gemini1506 +, writes (6 September 2007):
HiyaBy the way you are very smart to want to wait for the right person.Okay basically you dont HAVE to get undressed completely its totally up to you.Boys may have ther prefence some like shaved and some dnt and some dnt even care! So really its upto you and what your comfortable with.And dont worry about your bumps either boys dnt notice even doh it may feel like it but trust me he wouldnt mind.Everyones first times aint always perfect. It dont matter if you freeze or whatever you will get into it and if he is right for you he will understand.TRUST ME YOU WILL KNOW WHEN YOU HAVE AN ORGASMBy the way you can do it as little or as often as you want... its your body.Condoms are very safe and its very rare that you'll get an std frm them. Splitting is rare to and you can do things like not using vaseline or anything very oily with condoms.Hope i've helped you with your problem
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A
female
reader, JessIzFit +, writes (6 September 2007):
 Hello my name is Lou,Right first of all, no offense, but you need to boost your confidence. Sure every1 gets scared being nake din front of some1, but once you find the right guy, who cares a lot about you, he won't mind, heck, he may be as scared as you =)You will no when you have an orgasmm it is a wonderful feeling and for me ( don't no about any 1 else) it is a wild sensation that feels like you need to pee.Urm, to stop a condom splitting, member to lubricate really well before sex, otherwise i don't really no what to say,Take care of yourself and well done 4 waiting till your 16, it's the right thing to do,Hope i helped and mail me if you need more helpLouXXXXX
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