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female
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anonymous
writes: I have this problem, me and my mate of five years have always had sex regularly and just this year I just don't want to could it be because I am falling out of love or do we need to spice it up more? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 March 2006): I agree with Juliaqulia's assessment. Your troubles with a low libido could be a medical problem. Before you strike your relationship up to being a big loss, get to your doctor and have a good physical. There could be a number of things that could be affecting your libido. Start there. Hormonal shifts, depression, stress..the list is endless. Loss of desire is common in women. It can be put right, but you need to look carefully at the causes of the problem – preferably with the loving cooperation of your partner. There aren’t usually any ‘quick fixes'. But you can get it back to normal with time. However, if you feel that psychological or relationship factors are the cause, Couples Counselling may be something well worth considering.
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female
reader, MissMo +, writes (24 March 2006):
when i don't feel like having sex with my boyfriend, it's usually because i'm annoyed at him, upset about something, or feeling unattractive. A decreased sex drive is pointing out some sort of problem. Is there something about him that has been bothering you recently? Before breaking up with my ex-boyfriend, I stopped having sex with him. "I just didn't want it anymore," as you say. I didn't feel connected to him anymore, and the desire to physically connect was no longer there. In addition to that, the sex wasn't that great, so i had no desire for mediocre sex - thus i'd never want to do it. good luck figuring out what the problem is!
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reader, smeedle  +, writes (24 March 2006):
 Try spicing it up if you can be bothered if not finish it and move on, there is nothing worse than being with someone you just dont fancy anymore and the sex is just not doing it, you are not married and hopefully there are no children so gently break it to him that it is over and go find another play mate.
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female
reader, juliagulia +, writes (24 March 2006):
 It could be that there are problems with your relationship that are making you feel distant. It could be that you have lost desire for some other reason - like a medication you are taking, or your age, or something else. Only you can really determine that. But sometimes losing interest in sex is a symptom of depression and if you have other symptoms like a loss of interest in other things you used to enjoy or you have stopped hanging out with friends, etc. then you should see your doctor. I hear that Wellbutrin can help increase sexual desire again. But try to reflect on why you may be feeling the way you feel before you seek a quick fix. Good luck!
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 March 2006): I dont think that it is a problem. You have probably just grown out of him but i would suggest talking to your partner and see if this helps.
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