A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am 22 and have been in a relationship for the past 4 years with John. he is my first and only boyfriend. we've started talking about marriage and kids. sometimes i get freaked out about being so young, not having 'played the field' and not being certain that John is the one. Last week i was quite drunk and had sex with another man, who i am friends with and have a small crush on. I am certain I have no ongoing interest in this man. but i don't know if me cheating means john isn't the one, or that it was just a manifestation of my committment fears mixed with alcohol. and i don't know if i should tell john - there is absolutely no way he could find out otherwise. please help
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female
reader, youcant loose what you never had!  +, writes (17 September 2007):
sound to me that he isn't the one.if you found out he had cheated on you would you stick by him?
ok so you say he will never find out but it'll be on your mind for the rest of your life unless you come clean or ditch him i may sound a little harsh and im not trying to make you feel horrible but the reality is maybe you are to young for this commitment maybe you want to feel free to explore and try new things with different people.staying with him and pretending nothing happened will ruin the relationship down the line.you need to break it off and tell him he isn't the one most people think they have found the one in there first love and maybe you have but cheating on him isn't the way to prove your love for him.if not for you you cant stay with him for him he doesn't deserve it.you both need to find the right one.and personally i don't think he is sorry.do whats best for you tell him and risk loosing him or ditch him but don't carry on as if everything's fine!
hope my advice helped keep me posted x make the right desicion! xxx
A
male
reader, Tommy7  +, writes (16 September 2007):
You need to decide if you really feel sorry about what you've done and whether you want to "play the field." Most people lead happy lives without first playing the field. For most people playing the field is only a fantascy.
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