A
female
age
30-35,
*ev93
writes:I need help!!! I have been datin my bf for one year now, 2 months ago i checkd his fone randomly n saw his bbm chats wif some chic n she was talkin about takin pills n being careful n he was saying he ddnt want to be a father, meanin they had sex, and then in other chats wif girls, he kept on askin them "r u gonna stay over" I confronted him n i was really mad, he denyd having sex wif the first girl n sed i misinterpreted the whole thing, i forgave him tho cos i really love him bt honestly, i cant trust him agen, i still find myself checking his fone n all, n i hate it, i dont believe a word he says bt i still love him, HELP!! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (28 May 2011):
 the lack of trust will eat at you and the relationship... i find that trust is one of the most important aspects of any relationship.
A
female
reader, Basschick  +, writes (28 May 2011):
 At some point you have to ask yourself; "Do I wanna live like this?"...always being the dectective, checking under the bed, behind the doors, over your shoulder so to speak. It will get exhausting at some point. I say if you can't trust him, it might be time to ditch him. He obviously isn't truly ready to be committed to just one gal if he's doing these things on the side. It spells trouble for you. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, Denise32 +, writes (28 May 2011):
 Why ever SHOULD you stay with this man?!He is obviously not to be trusted and is cheating on you with other women. Think of it this way: what if one of those other "chicks" has an STD and then he has sex with you and you get infected? Seriously, is it worth it to risk your health and happiness?I do not agree with the other two posters who say give him the benefit of the doubt and stay with him until someone you can trust comes along. Better that you dump him now.I know it won't be easy and you'll be upset because you love him - but quite frankly, he is showing you no consideration and is not worthy of your love!!
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A
male
reader, a-g55  +, writes (28 May 2011):
 What would you like help with?
Trusting him again? Because that will be hard as he is obviously untrustworthy.
There is something in your relationship wrong because he wants to speak to other chicks. he isnt getting everything he needs from your relationship.
This might be because he enjoys the thrill of having a secret affair. and there is nothing you can do about this. you just have to keep your options open and stay with him until someone who you can trust comes along. then you can break his heart back
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A
female
reader, sammykins1984 +, writes (28 May 2011):
may i just say im excatly like you and ive been with my partner for 8years now.How do you feel about him right now in general? Has he been as attentive as usual, as loving? Do you feel like he's been putting you off recently or changing plans - being absent etc.
In other words, without you looking at his phone would you of been suspicious of him, would you have suspected anything at all is wrong in the relationship?
If the answer to the above is no, you might have to just give him the benefit of the doubt if you love him. How awful it would be if it wasn't true and he had to get grief from you when he'd done nothing wrong.do think long and hard about your future and wether you want him in it.
Situations like this are never easy.
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