A
male
age
,
*133oyu
writes:hello,this may sound obsurd but i have a partner whom loves me all the time i on the other hand feel love for her sometimes them sometimes not.she is really a wonderful person and i dont want to loose her and i desprately want to love her as much as she does me.we are both divorsed under the same circumstances,both our ex's had affairs she has 2 girls 12 and 17 living with her i have boy and girl 22 and 19 not living with me.i live with my disabled mother and my girlfriend has a flat with her children, she would like me to live with her but my mother can hardly walk and i have to do most things for her, i only see my partner w/ends as is difficult otherwise and i work nights due to circumstances.can you possibly give any advice on this as i am so confused.thank you.
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male
reader, DJ8433  +, writes (12 September 2007):
 We live "in a world of what we want is only what we want until it's ours." Quote from Train I think there may be a lot more going on here than just what you've written, because you sound down and out and it's not just about the love issue. You're having to deal with your Mum. You've raised kids and now you might have to help her raise hers. You may not be getting enough attention from your partner, since you only see her on weekends. You're reaching mid life and may be wondering what the hell you've done with your life. You've been cheated on and probably have a hard time with trust. You may have settled for just loving someone instead of finding someone and falling "in love". Which I'm sure taking time to meet people you just can't do because you have to take care of your Mum. Just like any red blooded male, you probably feel like you're not getting enough in the sack play time. Are any of these "on the mark"?
A
male
reader, n133oyu +, writes (12 September 2007):
n133oyu is verified as being by the original poster of the questionno but it nice to know that your not alone.
and i bet you've fallen for some right gits.
Why is life like that,when you know that you've found someone really nice,caring,dependable,honest,faithful and you know you can trust whatever ya just cant seem to love them like the horrible ones.
I think its maybe you dont have to chase them they are just there. ;-)
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2007): I am in almost the exact same boat with my boyfriend. I'm desperate to love him as madly as he loves me as he is the perfect life companion...have you figured out the answer yet??
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A
male
reader, DJ8433 +, writes (10 September 2007):
Sorry, I've been out of town. Like I said, do these things for her and you should get back what you give. When someone gives to you , you feel their love and want to reciprocate. If you stop showing love you stop getting love. A good starting point is to sit down alone and try to remember the first time you were together and you felt the love. Then remember the first time you were apart and how you felt pain in your heart. Now imagine your life without her, if you don't feel a sense of loss if you were without her, then I don't think you are in love.
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A
male
reader, n133oyu +, writes (31 August 2007):
n133oyu is verified as being by the original poster of the questionto the first answer,
i know love is a verb, but i want to have the feelings of love, im finding that difficult and i dont know why.
i feel incapable of feeling love and want to know how to regain the feeling.
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A
male
reader, DJ8433 +, writes (30 August 2007):
Love is a verb. You have to show her you love her. Bring her flowers, chocolate, a card, take her to a chick flick. Massage her feet for her, give her a back rub. Ask her what she wants, within reason, give it to her. Show her you love her with kindness, compassion,, caring, and yes cuddling. Tell her she's pretty, tell her she's beautiful and perfect for you. Flatter her. All this is part of being a man, not a macho man, but her knight in shining armor. Be her king and she will reward you and be your Queen. Tell her you want to be her king and do some of the things I've said here, but you have to follow through, without follow through it all means nothing. Have fun, and show her how much you love her.
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