A
female
age
36-40,
*arahJean247
writes:Help me with my decision!I have been with Caleb for a year and a half. We have had some rough patches. I love him an incredible amount but I want him to do more with his life. Sometimes he seems unmotivated to work and find a job.He lost his job two months ago and is looking at the moment. I know it's only ben two months but i just think he should be on it more... instead of once a week. Sheesh, He was living with me for some time until one night when i discovered he had been on those dating sites talking to chicks. He said he does it because he doesn't feel like women check him out and it's his way of flirting. I call bull. On top of that i had found out that he had met up with his ex-girlfriend to see her 'one last time' so he knew he was completely over her. Sounded weird to me too. I kicked Caleb out. I told him he needed to work and get a job and start doing something with his life and decide what he really wants before we can be together again. Made sense to me... see if he would shape up. In the last two months he has been trying to prove himself to me. We still hang out very often and spend a lot of time together. Sometimes I get scared of what he would do if i left him for good. I don't think he could handle it with everything going on in his life. He has said in the past that if we weren't together and only seeing each other he couldn't handle being around me. Caleb and I do have a lot of issues, but he is a good man. He really would do anything for me. Then there is Vince. I met him over a year ago and we have been friends. I met him at a time when Caleb and I were on a break and we hit it off good. He has a good career (doctor), 2 kids he loves dearly, stable, etc. He has wanted to date me since we met but i have been kinda blowing him off, gong back and forth with him.... etc. He knew i had been dating Caleb and we were separated. He just never knew we got back together is all. ;) I continued talking to him and he always seems intriguing to me. I wonder, what if?I can't say i know anything bad about Vince yet... but also i know i have seen him a total of ten times.... when you are still on good behavior.I am not dating anyone right now but i need to make a decision. I can't sleep with two men. I can't do that to Caleb and I can't keep leading Vince on. Caleb has NO IDEA about Vince. He would flip out.I love Caleb so much and wish he could be the man i think he can be. But I also know you can't make somebody change.I'm stuck in this box. PLEASE HELP!
View related questions:
a break, ex girlfriend, flirt, got back together, his ex, lost his job Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2011): Doctors do spend a lot of their waking hours waking, but not all doctors work the same number of hours. Some work more while others work less. Total work hours per doctors is dependent on several variables (ie. Specialty, Practice Environment, Setting). I'm dating a physician who whose working hours are substantially less than those of one of his physician colleagues as the colleagues specialty is more demanding. The hours work for us. Weigh this in your decision.
A
male
reader, Jmtmj  +, writes (18 January 2011):
 With two kids and working as a doctor, you realize you're not going to have a lot of free time to spend with Vince should you start dating... Nowhere near as much as Caleb. Work and his kids will always take priority over you.
That's one bad thing about Vince already...
...............................
A
male
reader, Advice_man +, writes (18 January 2011):
 Hmm...this one is tough, i don't know what to advice. But note one thing: "What shines doesn't mean it's gold". Don't be blinded by his doctor career. Doctors are often on high demand by women, people look at them as if they are Gods and because of that they often have a bad, arrogand attitude. They work a lot of hours and have little time to spend with their families. Just don't mislead youself picturing yourself as "wife of the doctor". Best wishes
...............................
|
