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male
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anonymous
writes: I've been with my partner for 6 months.I'm 21 and she is only 16.I'm an attractive guy who can get attractive girls. I've had alot of opportunities to sleep with girls but have only slept with 3, I guess I'm just picky.I've only been having intercourse since i was 18, but have been sexually active since I was 13My partner is an amazing looking girl and we are very much in-love, we are like best friends and we only have eyes for each other.Heres my problem - shes been sexually active since she was 12 and been having intercourse since she was 13, shes slept with around 50 guys... yes 50 guys... at such a young age and in such a small period of time.I can't seem to let her past go, it just gets to me too much. She doesn't like to talk to me about some aspects of her past sex life but I pressure her into telling me and since we're so hounest with each other she reluctantly tells me even though she is ashamed of some of it.To give you an indication:She used to be into her drugs in a big wayAt one of her workplaces she slept with aprox 14 of the males working there in 4 months.At a flat she was living in they used to have orgies with guys and girls. However on a couple of occassions it would just be her and about 1/2 a dozen guys sleeping with her all at once.I could go on and on but you get the idea.Shes been drug-free for just over a year and her sluttyness slowly dropped down once she stopped her drugs.I am her longest relationship and shes told me this is the first time shes been in-love with anyone.I'm not worried about her cheating on me or anything, but I can't let her past go, I keep thinking about it and getting angry or jealos although I try really, really hard not to but it does get in the way of our relationship.Anyone got any advice for me? Am I an ass-hole? I personally just think that I am or I'm insecure in many ways but would be nice to get some opinions of what to do. Also just to note: I don't need anyones theories on why she slept with so many people as I already she why she did.
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best friend, drugs, her past, insecure, period, sex life, workplace Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 November 2006): i dont think that you should worry about i came form a verry bad past and i slept around alot to when i was alot younger im 19 now and ive grown up alot it still bothers me to talk about it but if she got out of it than very good for her chances are she feels really bad and you probaly saved her something that she needed in her life just someone to love her and if you can do that just get over her past and live happily together
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 June 2006): Its the original poster again.Shes had an STI check recently and no she doesn't have anything fortunatly.Ariel - I think it can work or I wouldn't have been with her this long, shes an amazing person and shes very hounest.Martini - Before we hooked up we were just mates, and I knew of some of her sexual past and it didnt put me off, funny how things change when u fall in-love eh?Angelicc - Thanks for your advice. But I try not to get jealos or think about it but everytime i do i just get so angry.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 June 2006): This doesn't help anyone, but I just want to say that she is friggin disgusting. The first image that comes to mind is a naked chicken with STD's all over its body... 8[
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A
female
reader, carebear  +, writes (24 June 2006):
 dear male anon
There is another post like yours on this site it has numerious answers to your question and they all vary if you can try to check back on most answred or most discussed you will find this post i hope it helps you and that'a all i am going to add
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2006): My advice would be to get the both of you checked out for STD's or STI's as if shes really slept with 50 guys the chances are she has one.
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A
female
reader, Angelicc +, writes (24 June 2006):
 Everybody has a past but you just bring it up all the time, pressuring her into tellling you everything about it isn't gonna help her get over it or move on from it but relive it. And moving on from her past is something that she need to do.
Sure yea talking about it may help her move on for it too but its something that she should do in her own time.
She's an amazing person she pulled herself out of drugs and gained control of her life. Sure she has a terrible past loads of people do but her williness to pull herself out of it and move on is an amazing achievement. which should give her your respect and trust.
Apart from her past do you have a reason to believe that she'll cheat on you. she's told you that she only person she loved plus she's drug free and you the only person she's with.
So just love her, respect that she's not ready to talk about her past and try to let go of you jealousy it'll only ruin your relationship.
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