A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I've been living with a married man for more than a year and now i am pregnant and about to gave birth on May. Although we are living together,he did not yet end up his relationship with his wife who has an 8 years old daughter with him. He admitted that he still love his wife but he also loves me and do not want to leave me. His relatives is not aware of our relationship because he is still hiding it from them and from the other people around them. The wife's family is not also aware on our relationship,the two of them are pretending they're okay and still living together even if not. They are married for about 8years and I'm married also but already separated from my husband ever since we started our affair. My husband knows about my pregnancy and still helping me financially because that is what he wanted. One year after our wedding, my husband left for abroad and returns after 2 years but I already having an affair with this guy. And when he returns to abroad after a vacation for a week i admitted the truth over the internet. I ask him to let go of me because I am really in love with this guy and I don't want to pretend that I still love him. I don't want him to suffer, he is a great man and i don't deserve a him. But my lover did not do the same. He is still communicating and having a relationship with his wife. This past few days he admitted he wants to go back to his wife and arrange everything with his wife but according to him he can't do it even if he wanted because he cares for me and still in love with me.He don't know what to do now because he cannot give up both of us.He is lying to his wife by now and tells his wife that he don't love me anymore and tells that he is just accompanying me.Although I know what is the real score,I am still hurting...EVERYDAY, because of knowing that even we are living together,he cannot leave his wife totally... My husband knows everything about my condition now and he wants to accept my baby and fix everything but I refuse because I don't want him to suffer.I really don't love him anymore... What my head and heart's need and wanted is the father of my child... even it causes me of pain EVERY SINGLE DAY... What I needed now is some piece of advice and if you are also in the same situation,please share it and help me through your experiences.Thank you.
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affair, married man, the internet, wedding Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Babydoll86  +, writes (18 May 2011):
Hi, i was in this situation 3 months ago! I was pregnant to my married man an he wouldnt tell his wife and family... Only differsnce is im ashamed to say i wimped out and had a termination as i was terrified of being left alone to pick up the peices!
I honestly do sympathise with you, i feel you have been punished enough for your crimes and are seriously feeling the pressure now. Try not to stress while you are still pregnant though. When the bsby comes slong then its ultimatum time- be tough! Tell him once and for all its you or the wife- and mean it.
Good luck x
A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 April 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the question Hi Everyone!I am really grateful for all your responses.To add the details,yes I guess I let this happen because I don't want him to leave me.Even when I am not yet pregnant,there are several times that we are about to end living together but It didn't ever happens because we believe, we can't live without each other and because we love each other.
I have to admit that I am a lot beautiful,sexy and attractive than his wife.I can't be compare with her even in making a household choirs.His wife doesn't know how to cook and not as responsible as me as a wife and mother to his child.That's the main reason why this guy falls for me.
The three of us are working in one company before,and it all starts there.But after the issues of our affairs,we all leave the company and get another job.
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A
male
reader, welsh  +, writes (25 April 2011):
Life is giving you a second chance with your husband willing to accept you and the baby. Take it, don't mess it up persisting with this other man of yours.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2011): Read all the drama in " Trapped-in-a-loveless-marriage.html" April 18 2011
So my question is this: Did you deliberately fall pregnant to trap your married lover? Honey, you want a full time father for your unplanned baby but what about the 8 year old. Doesn't this kid deserve a full time father As well? If you take this man away from his 8 year old then what? Happily ever after for you? Think again.
Your married man is ashamed to tell anyone of your existence. Why? Bec he doesn't want his friends, family and I'm laws to know that you are knocked up as well. This man is having the best of both worlds. He has sex with u and his wife. He has told you already that he still loves his wife and no amount of pressure from you will change this.
Next time, don't forget your pill and think twice before falling pregnant with a married mans child.
This situation has disaster written all over it. I doubt your married man will leave his wife for you. What he will do is divide his time between the two of you, and once you become stale he will drop you like a hot potato.
Your hb has been kind to pay for you financially. However you need to divorce him and settle down as a single parent, whose married lover drops by from time to time.
Not an ideal situation for you, but a damn good one for the man.
Is this how you envisage the rest of your life?
LoveGirl
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2011): Listen, you should not be in this position having a baby with a married man and to make matters worse, you are married; You belong to someone else. I have had an affair with a married man and i'm a married woman, it happened once and I regret it everyday. I thought I didn't love my husband but it was an illusion. After awhile my love came back for my husband and now it's stronger than ever. The married man ur pregnant for WILL NOT leave his Wife. He may very well have feelings for you but he has ties with his wife. You do not know the moments, memories or love they have shared before he met u. Something emotional or physical is missing in their relationship, he's just using u to fill the void. He may not live with her but his mind is still there. He hasn't introduced to his family because its disgraceful because the two of u r stepping out of your marriages. The two of you will not have a bright future because ur relationship was built out of selfishness and out of the misery of others. You should leave this man and go back to your husband who loves u and try to make it work instead of making a man use u or go on your own because ur gonna end up on your own anyway.
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