A
male
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I have no desire for sex, does that mean I’m doomed to live a life alone?I’m a 25 year old guy, still a virgin, and I have never had the desire to have sex. However, even though I am happy to remain celibate because of this, has it doomed my chances of love? I mean to most people sex is a very important part in a relationship. I mean how likely are my chances of finding a woman, who would be ok with a no sex relationship? And before you say it, no I don’t masturbate, or watch porn. When I mean I have no desire for sex, I mean exactly that.
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celibate, no desire, porn, still a virgin Reply to this Question |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2008): the fact you don't have a desire for sex at all might be a problem masturbation and porn is a way of saying that your mental sexuality is working, as well as physical, unless their are physical problems,like not physically able to get an erection etc. you should not try to get a girlfreind with no sex drive like you ,you should see a doctor about it,because their is such a condition out there that disables ones sex drive.and it might be treatable. As for me im a 24 yr old virgin but mastubate and watch porn. good luck man i hope i helped ya a bit.
A
male
reader, Frank B Kermit  +, writes (24 May 2007):
 There is an organization run by David Jay for Asexuals, people who do not ever experience sexual desire. BAsically you make up a small percentage of the population. Can you find love? Yes. Emotionally speaking, and ideally with other asexuals. However, if you want to be with someone that is not asexual, then you may have to opt for an open-relationship of some sort, so that her needs can be met as well. If you are unable to sexually function at all, you may need new medical technologies to assist in having your own children.
-FBK
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 April 2007): how the hell did that other answer get posted? that was so unhelpful!! anyway i agree with the others. it may just be a phase or something and maybe u could go to the doctors, but dont worry about it, there may be a girl out there for u who feels the same, well we know there is seeing as Starburst below said shes there same lol!!
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A
male
reader, martini +, writes (23 April 2007):
 How did the comment below get approved?
Anyway, to Anon 22-25, no you're not doomed. There are people out there that aren't sexual at all and form intimate relationships for more pure emotional and mental reasons. The problem with this however is that your chances of finding someone like that might have slimmed down to quite a lot. However, this also depends on where you live, and what type of women and/or men you are attracted to you.
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A
female
reader, Starburst +, writes (22 April 2007):
 no i dont think it has doomed ur chances of love, im only 20 but im exactly the same. Actually me and my 2 friends were talking the other month and all 3 of us said we'd actually be happy in a relationship with a guy without the sex, just the love and affection like a cuddle or something so dont stress about it, i bet ur not the only guy like it and there are definately girls looking for the same thing and u never know, we may change in the future who knows?! hope this was of some comfort :-) xx
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A
male
reader, mitch +, writes (22 April 2007):
also foundhttp://www.telegraph.co.uk/health/main.jhtml?xml=/health/2006/11/13/hcelibate13.xml&page=1
might be enlightening...
But as Zim says - perhaps you've just not met that special person yet for whom you might be attracted to! Never close any doors to anything, espcially given your age.
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A
male
reader, mitch +, writes (22 April 2007):
also foundhttp://www.telegraph.co.uk/health/main.jhtml?xml=/health/2006/11/13/hcelibate13.xml&page=1
might be enlightening...
But as Zim says - perhaps you've just not met that special person yet for whom you might be attracted to! Never close any doors to anything, espcially given your age.
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A
male
reader, mitch +, writes (22 April 2007):
also foundhttp://www.telegraph.co.uk/health/main.jhtml?xml=/health/2006/11/13/hcelibate13.xml&page=1
might be enlightening...
But as Zim says - perhaps you've just not met that special person yet for whom you might be attracted to! Never close any doors to anything, espcially given your age.
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A
male
reader, Zim +, writes (22 April 2007):
 I would'nt say that this would affect your relationships in the future at all. Whilst some people regard sex as the be all and end all in a relationship, it really isn't. Quite a lot of people prefer to abstain from sex until marriage either through religious or non religious reasons. Obviously, you will have the ethos in some groups where it's expected to have sex in a relationship, but in my experience, a woman respects you a lot more for not wanting sex. It shows that you like her for who she is, not what she looks like and that's very important at the beginning of a relationship. Believe me though, you will begin to have "desires" after going out with someone for a while if not at first.
"You don't love a woman because she is beautiful, she is beautiful because you love her."
I live by this philosophy and its given me some really amazing experiences in my life so far.
I hope that helps.:-)
ZIM
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A
male
reader, mitch +, writes (22 April 2007):
well a quick google search came up withhttp://www.asexualove.net/
Perhaps this might be someone to look for someone for be with?
Theres nothing wrong with being asexual, its just the way some people are!
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