A
female
age
51-59,
*orothea
writes:This question could be a bit long and I apologise for that. The situation is, today I came home from work early and when I let myself in the hall I noticed my partner jumped up and switched off the telly really quickly and sat back down again. When I came in I noticed his trousers had been badly pulled up as they werent even covering his backside and the sky tv box was on. His heart was racing and he was sweaty. He had obviously been having a crafty tug lol. About 3 minutes later he switched off the sky. You may think Im going to say I was upset by this but I wasnt I thought it was hilarious. But I can see that this could be a problem in our relationship. You see I was sexually abused by a man in a past relationship, he used to make me watch porn and make me do things I did not want. This completely put me off porn and I told my current partner that I dont want any in the house at all. He agreed to this and has been very kind and considerate for the 5 years weve been together. I can tell that he is totally shocked that I nearly caught him today but I really am not that bothered as I know he is not an abuser. When we first got together I used to freak out about every little thing because of what had happened but these days Im feeling better. How am I going to clear this up and let him know Im not all that bothered any more?
View related questions:
porn Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, DenimandLace44  +, writes (8 October 2010):
 That struck my funny bone. I think you should just matter of factly mention it and that you didnt mind. You can say that it was funny and you were glad it was you catching him rather than him catching you. :) Then move on. Don't make a big deal out of it, but let him know that you are fine. Or just print out this thread and pack it in his lunch box...hahahahahaha
A
male
reader, serenity80 +, writes (8 October 2010):
Tell him, and tell him it's because you trust him so know it isn't the same as what happened to you before.
...............................
A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (8 October 2010):
 Don't mention it. No one likes to get "caught" masturbating and regardless of why, he will be embarrassed. If you do bring it up that you wouldn't mind him masturbating, then don't bring this up. Just mention it later, out of context.
...............................
A
male
reader, dirtball +, writes (8 October 2010):
 Just sit him down and tell him. Let him know that you aren't upset by what you saw and that you've made a lot of progress in the time the two of you have been together. Let him know you still don't like porn but understand that he's a good guy and if he has a "crafty tug" every once and a while you don't mind.
Lay it out. Open communication is what's best for both people in a relationship to know where they stand. I'm glad you've made such progress.
...............................
A
female
reader, Honeygirl  +, writes (8 October 2010):
 Sit your partner down and apologise for interrupting him! Tell him that you dont have a problem with him masturbating however, you feel awkward because you caught him 'on the job'.
All men watch porn, and maybe your partner just needed a bit of 'alone' time.... nothing wrong with that.
...............................
|
