A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:how will i know if im ready for sex? me and my bf have been together for just over 8 months and we havnt had sex and i am still a virgin. i often think about having sex with him but sometimes i get scared becus im a virgin and hes not and whether it will affect our relationship if im not very good in bed. i dont want to lose him and he is constantly reminding me that he loves me and says that he wants to wait until im ready for sex.
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ready for sex, still a virgin Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 May 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwe do often talk about things we are very open with each other and i feel really comfortable talkin to him about things becus he is always concerned about how i feel.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 May 2008): If your boyfriend is willing to wait for you then he should be kind enough to not care if you mess up when having sex, anyway, I cant think about any way you can be bad at having sex, and if your boyfriend is ready, give it your best shot!
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A
female
reader, lexilou +, writes (5 May 2008):
 If he is willing to wait then let him wait as long as it takes. You will know when the time is right as you wont stop at the heavy petting/kissing stage but will take it further. You seem to have your head screwed on right so just keep on doing what you are doing now. DOnt worry about getting it wrong or it not being good for him - he know's you are a virgin and it will mean a lot to him and he will be gentle and slow if what you have already said about him is anything to go for. If you are worrying about it so much you are not quite ready yet so just slow it down a bit and take your time x
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 May 2008): It is a shame there are not alot more young women out there like you. I am incredibly impressed with the way you have handled this challenging issue. And it is a challenge.
This is exactly the time in your life when you start to wonder and decide if 'it's time or your ready'. And I think too many girls/young women go along with a decision like your facing and perhaps are not really ready. I suppose you could simplify it as much as if there is any doubt at all, that's your sign that you not totally convinced, yet.
The other thing to consider is that if you not ready and totally comfortable, then nothing, nothing at all is lost.
But giving yourself to someone in the most intimate way one can, should be a gift, and it is also a gift, to you.
Your so lucky to be in a lovely stable relationship. You partner sounds as if he respects you and still loves you for it!. Your communicating with him which is awesome and should continue. When sex and deep intimacy becomes part of a relationship, it changes and your feelings will deepen and evolve. He sounds like a great guy and willing to wait, that shows you, not only how important it is, but how important you are!
Sex should be respected far more than it is. Most of the problems on this site are at some point involving sex, broken hearts and emotions out of control, so these are all the unspoken chain reactions of embarking on taking things to a different level.
Your growing up into a women who is understanding more about relationships, sexuality and how things change, when sex becomes part of the equation. Handle it with the sensible mature way you are, discuss it with people you respect and care about and make sure your just at peace with letting that part of your innocence go.
All the best.
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 May 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionawwh thanx for the replies im startin to feel a little more at ease about it now xx
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A
female
reader, lets_party +, writes (4 May 2008):
 u will know when ur ready u will feel that your with the right guy.. your a virgin and if he knows that then he knows that u wont be that experenced, if u feel that your sitll not ready then ur not ready u will know if ur ready and if ur with the right guy
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