A
male
age
41-50,
*amak
writes:hello, im having a problem with my girlfriend and its all my fault, since a year now that we started this relationship,i ve cheated on her and lied without knowing the reason why i did all this to her, though i lied because i dont want to lose her, now she has found out all this lies and cheat and dont feel thesame with me again, she cant even look at my face again, and the truth is that i found real love with her and wont ever be happy if i lose her, please what do i do to prove to her that i will never lie to her or cheat on her again,and bring her back with me again.. thanks my name is emmanuel.. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Troyyy  +, writes (6 November 2010):
Okay like acctually im having literally the same problem with my ex now. exactally as Zamak wrote. Except, she wants me 2 prove im sorry/love her/and it'll never happen again, as me this is my first love, she still loves me and i still love her, im soooo stuck and under so much stress, got evicted while this happened, and i feel like im falling apart, im bad at speaking with girls and SHOWING this stuff, i only know how to SAY it. But this helps, and to be honest.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 December 2008): You should have relised she was the love of your life before you did this terrible thing to her, you can only hope that through time she will forgive you and you can make it up to her, as others say its a pity that sometimes we only relise what we have right beseida us when it is to late hopefully its not to late in your case but you have learned a bitter lesson in life, not worth any off it sometomes to play around
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A
female
reader, Plain Jane  +, writes (7 December 2008):
 Cheating is like a crack on a mirror...it will never be mend nicely anymore....so sorry for you to learn his bitter lesson.
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A
female
reader, petina1  +, writes (7 December 2008):
 Its like we don't know what we had until we lost it and it's a classic case. You were always alright with your lifestyle, cheating etc. As long as your lady friend didnt find out and you may have gone on doing this for a long time. Now unfortunately she has found out and now you are in danger of losing her. That must hurt your ego, is this real love you feel or just a sense of loss that makes you believe that it is. It is the worst kind of hurt in a relationship and I wouldn't count on her ever being the same with you again. You need to learn a lesson from this and if you chose to take part in a relationship again make sure that you can be committed to it or it will be a continuous cycle. I'm sorry to have to say this but it is one of the big 'no , no's in a relationship'. It is very disrespectful to cheat behind someones back. Put it down to experience and look after the next lady you meet and you will be fullfilled. hope this helps.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 December 2008): I agree, she did believe you and you betrayed her, cheating on a woman is one of the most hurtful things you can do to the person that is meant to be the most important in your life. If she chooses to forgive you, it will be hard for her, it will be forever in the back of her mind and she will most probably never accept what you did. You cheated and the real consequences of that are that you may lose her. Maybe you need to have answers as to why you did it, it was an action that really hurt someone and you don't have answers? She will never understand why, maybe she thinks that if you really loved her you wouldn't have done it. She will be hurt, then angry, give her time, be patient, if she is going to consider staying with you give her that time but in that time don't do anything stupid like be with someone else. Be 100% honest, if she asks, give her the answers even if they may be hurtful and let her have access to your phone, emails, if she wants that and without hesitation. If you really love her and want her back then you will do as she asks without fighting her.
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A
female
reader, Shade'sGirl +, writes (7 December 2008):
I know how it feels to find true love and know that if you lost them you'd never let it go. But the point of the matter is it was YOU that cheated on HER. If you cared so much then why did you do that? That's what she will think, it's certainly what i would.
You've broken her trust and it takes a looooooong time to build it up again. Show her you're sincere; buy her flowers, make her feel special. Tell her that you want to really try with her, show her your post and let her see that you're really really trying
Best of luck, i hope all goes well for you :)
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A
female
reader, shiraz +, writes (7 December 2008):
hiyah to gain back the trust is hard and sometimes its just gone and you cant get it back. you seem to really want it though so give it all you have, tell her exactly how you feel really open up to her and be honest, if your honest about your feelings its a way forward. explain to her how much she means and you respect her discision but you really want this, this last chance.
this will make or break you, if your relationship survives this then you can tackle anything as you have the support of each other, the only question is can she? dont judge her just try and understand it from her point of view, it takes a big thing for a guy to admit a mistake and try and fix it but it takes a bigger person to forgive. and sometimes it just doesnt go the right way, give it all youve got. best of luck let us know how it works! xxx
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A
male
reader, Jon1230 +, writes (7 December 2008):
 Hey mate,
What you need to do is get her to listen to you first of all.You need to be able to pour your heart out to this girl and tell her that she is the one and REALLY mean it from the bottom of your heart.
Sometimes there simply is no going back but if she will meet you and let you have your say then that shows she still loves you.
You only have one chance to make her see how much she means to you.
So dont mess this up!!
Jon
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A
female
reader, katatonik +, writes (7 December 2008):
 She may never trust you 100% again.
I'm sorry to say that, but it's true. She believed you before and you cheated and lied, there is no magic fix for this. All you can do is apologize to her and tell her what you have said here--or even show her your post if you think it may help convince her of your sincerity.
If she does stay with you, the only way to win some of her trust back will be good behavior over time. Good luck =]
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