A
male
age
36-40,
*rOveranalysing
writes:How important is who you surround yourself with? I firmly have always been influenced by who my friends are and who is around me. I obviously hold on to the friends that matter and I continue to connect with. But is keep friends who you had previous great times with but dont feel a strong connection to anymore. I often feel that in life its important to stay editorial in who stays in your life. If someone makes you feel sad or bring you down, and you are unable to fix it, maybe it is a personality mismatch. I read a quote by the actor johnny depp which said "you should always surround yourself with people that are better than you because this will precipitate growth". What are your thoughts on this? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (5 September 2016):
 I think it's always best to stick to having positive people around you and not too many negative.... BUT it comes down to authenticity too.
To bring up your example of Johnny Depp... AFTER all the shit hit the fan with his soon to be ex wife... several of his friends mentioned how they WISH they had spoken up more critical of what they saw, but they didn't out of fear of losing a good friend.
So with that, I think having people who lifts you up and whom YOU in turn can lift up as well is great, but... better is people who you can be honest with and who are honest with you.
I think people who are a drain on you, emotionally, financially and socially are best left at the way side. People who only take, not give. That happens with some friends, I think it's natural.
Some friends are just "downgraded" to acquaintances because the friendship isn't totally broken but it's not a priority for either.
I think the subject isn't so black and white as you present it. You do what you FEEL/THINK is right for you.
A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious + ♥, writes (5 September 2016):
 But who decides who is "better" than someone else? And "better" in what way?
I have to admit to becoming more picky about my friends as I have aged. I no longer waste time on people who don't add anything positive to my life in some way. I aim for quality rather than quantity. If I look forward to seeing someone, I am happy to have them as a friend. If I dread seeing them, or have a psych myself up to meeting up with them, they have to be struck off my friends list as I think life is too short to waste on people whose company you view as a chore.
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