A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Can anyone please off me any advice on how to deal with my competitive and rude neighbour? Basically my husband and i moved to our house about 2 years ago and we get on with all our neighbours but we have 1 particular neighbour who is very competitive and nosey and appears to put us down quite a lot.We have the smallest house in our cul de sac- a 3 bed detached- we compromised on space as we wanted a nice, prestigious area- which we were fortunate to get. Our neighbour unfortunately was quick to point out that we have the smallest house and boasted about his 5 bed extended house, going on and on about he spent doing it etc...Then about 4 months ago we purchased a new Audi A3 and he was quick to come over and say that he was purchasing the A6 as it was better etc... I'm not arguing that his A6 is better than ours but why be so rude and why involve the rest of the neighbours by comparing our 2 cars?He gets competitive about holidays too- he and his wife are going on a month long cruise and when we mentioned we were going to Italy for 2 weeks he had to make a dig at us saying we'd come back over weight, greasy and smelling of garlic! What a stupid thing to say! In addition to this he makes snide remarks when we have a takeaway (saying I should be cooking and not be lazy), he slags off any shops we've been too when he sees our shopping bags and the list goes on...Can I just make everyone aware both my husband and I work 40 + hour weeks and lazy is not what we are and I can cook but I hardly think 1 takeaway a month is wrong!We try to avoid him but I'm sure he waits for us to arrive home as he always seems to appear from his house, putting out the rubbish or putting something in his car. We don't want to fall out with him but how on earth to we tell him to leave us alone and to mind his own business??
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 March 2013): when I find people like this who like to boast I just look unimpressed I keep a neutral expression and answer with a Uhuh or indeed, look at your watch twice and say you have something else to do, whenever he stops you, just act bored and unaffected, be polite when he says something but be curt in your answers and certainly don't ask him anything, don't talk about the time, chit chat should be avoided at all costs, he'll get the hint.
A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (30 March 2013):
 WHY would you want to interact with jerks, such as the neighbors that you've described????...
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 March 2013): Sing to him every time he talks his rubbish @ anything you can do, I can do better, if he has a bit of a brain he may take the hint but chances are, he will reply with the chorus.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (30 March 2013):
 Lol, I'd never thought I'd seen the day when I'd be going to teach a Brit the fine art of " oh indeeding ", in which they are masters. The art of polite, neutral, BORED, let's -change-subject-'cause-I-don't-give-a-fuck comment.
" Oh indeed ". " Oh really " " I see".
Don't say anything else.Offer them a flat surface where they can't sink hooks in. Eventually they'll get tired, if they get no reaction out of you. I suspect they are keeping it on, precisely because they can sense they are hitting some nerve or making you uncomfortable. Don't give them this satisfaction, and the fun will be over soon.
As a matter of fact, I don't even understand why you bother being friendly with these guys, I understand that you don't want to noisily fall out with them, but what's the point of chatting about cars and vacations, a polite , frigid " Good morning " and " Good evening " could do, it does not sound as if they are very likeable neighbours. The area may be prestigious, but these neighbours ' attitude is rather... chavvy I think it's the word .
Btw : I am a not very patriotic Italian , in general- but I've got to say, pot calls kettle black. Why should you come back overweight from Italy ?? Being overweight here is far from the social epidemy which is in many Western countries , part it is the Mediteranean diet, part it's that we are all so vain, but we are one of the slimmest country in Europe.
While, the percentage of obese people with a BMI over 30, so not just overweight, OBESE, is a whopping 26 % in UK ! Nyah Nyah Nyah :)
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (30 March 2013):
 Why don't you want to fall out with him? It's obvious from his comments that he intends to fall out with you, and the sooner the better because then he will keep away from you.
There are people in the world who are pig headed, arrogant, nosey and beligerant and it doesn't matter what you do or say, they just love getting under people's skin. The most effective way to deal with this type of person is to completely ignore them, don't look at them, talk to them or engage with them in any way. Its really pathetic to compare assets and point out what you have...in fact it's almost laughable and he's making himself look an idiot!!
If he approaches you and says anything about where you shop or what you buy, just walk away from him mid sentence.
He's probably one of those men who likes to wind women up and then uses the 'calm down dear' mentality when a woman snaps back...truly ridiculous behaviour.
If he carries on, just lagh at him in a whimsical way and say 'You are a funny little man arn't you'
He needs taking down a peg or two.
I am sure your other neighbours are aware of his annoying habits so there is bound to be someone else to sympathise with you and it's none of this mans damn business if you order takeaway or do anything else for that matter...he's just a stupid twit...so ignore, ignore, ignore!!
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