A
male
age
18-21,
anonymous
writes:Heyive been seeing this woman for a little less than 2 months now and i am really into her. she has a kid and is 3 years older than i am.We are not official yet because she basically wants to make sure i am the right guy.we work together and we want to keep our relationship quite at work because we dont want to stop beign scheduled together and dont want people spreading rumors about us about why we get the best shifts.yesterday at work i asked her if she is trying to make me jealous and i think another woman walked up and heard me. then later on in the night she seemed down and i told her, "put a smile on your face or im going to have to get a real smile out of you night when i come over and watch the movie" and she turned around and said now you are talking too loud.she got off work before me and i was on the way to her house when she texted me she is tired and i gonna go to sleep so i called her and let her know i was half way already and she said ok fine. the whole next mornig she still seemed a little ticked offi called her today and she seemed mad at me so i asked her to tell me whats wrong and she said that me talking so people can hear me and the fact i came over makes her not want to have anything to do with me.i appologized today and she said "its fine. im over it" but idk if it was sincere.i just want to know what i should do. today we are supposed to watch the movie we didnt watch yesterday. what should i do? i feel like everything will be fine but want to make sure im doing the right thing and taking her word that everything is ok
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at work, jealous, text Reply to this Question |
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female
reader, Ginalolabridga + ♥, writes (27 October 2009):
 They say talk is cheap and it is, maybe that is why she is still insisting she does not want to be the centre of that cheap talk!
Gina
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2009): "What do i do... im so lost in relationships because i usually just go from girl to girl but i want to stay with this one"
If you want my advice this girl has the signs of being a disaster. She is moody, passive aggressive and doesnt know how to communicate.
Have you ever heard people who have been married along time say somethign like "well things were hard at first but then everything changed for the better"?
Of course not. If its this hard at the start, then this woman will be a disaster in a long term relationship.
Run away and save yourself years of aggravation and fights.
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A
male
reader, Markingbad +, writes (26 October 2009):
 You problem your talking when you should be listening.
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A
female
reader, Ask oldersister  + ♥, writes (26 October 2009):
 Poster, did you not read the advice? Leave her alone at work, do your job, or you will probably find yourself single.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwe watched the Proposal last night and she wouldnt get close to me for long. said she couldnt get comfortable so i talked to her about what happened the other day and she said it really is important because she does not want people talking ish and spreading rumors. she doesnt like drama at all and said it has made her get over me. (she has told me when a guy messes up, she just bails on them because she stayed around too long in a bad relationship and got abused and doesnt want it)
i talked to her about what we have and how great times are together and she agreed but added she doesnt want to be back in the same situation in 2 months where i appologize again. basically i have to be perfect.
before i left i gave her a kiss and said "so are we alright..." and she said "yea were fine" and i added "you and i... are fine" and she then said "yes we are dandy"
i dont know exactly what to do because she seems upset and was about to break it off with me but i was able to calm her down...
What do i do... im so lost in relationships because i usually just go from girl to girl but i want to stay with this one
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A
female
reader, icelordess + ♥, writes (26 October 2009):
 Secrets never stay secrets for long, and if you aren't more careful the whole workplace will know that you two are seeing each other. And trust me, nothing gets around faster than gossip..so cool it! Stop talking to her at work about personal things. Work/personal should be kept separate. You've already apologized, she accepted, but please respect her feelings and keep your relationship at work business oriented ONLY. Don't become the next water cooler conversation.
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A
female
reader, Ginalolabridga + ♥, writes (26 October 2009):
You need to consider her feelings more as to why she wants you to keep quiet about the two of you for now.
I am sure everything will be fine just calmly discuss this with her and how she would like you to go about just keeping your voice down whilst at work.
Gina
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A
male
reader, Markingbad +, writes (26 October 2009):
i feel like everything will be fine but want to make sure im doing the right thing and taking her word that everything is ok
Nope. I think if you cant be more discreet your going to end up working the opposite shift and single. Her job may be more important to her than yours is to you. She's a single parent. She doesnt want everybody gossiping about her.
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A
female
reader, Ask oldersister + ♥, writes (26 October 2009):
Hi, she was right in being upset with you- most people hate having gossip spread about them and the workplace is ripe grounds for this kind of drama. She also forgave you and got over it, okay? I suggest you do the same and be more careful about what you say in the future at work. Maybe just focus on doing your job from 8-5 and put on your "relationship hat" after business hours. Take care.
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