A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Ok so my boyfriend and I were at this party together, and he broke up with me in a fit of anger because I supposedly left with another guy and came back. This is the same guy that caused trouble between me and my bf before. What makes it worse is that my bf talked to some of my friends who were at the party and not one of them defended me. They all said "wow, she's really sketchy for leaving with that guy". I swear I left alone but everyone thinks I'm "playing dumb". He was really upset and ignored my calls for a whole day. The next day, he began to open up just a little and returned my call and agreed to hang out and talk about it. When I got there we talked a little until he suddenly didn't want to anymore. We continued to hang out for the rest of the day but he'd keep relapsing into moments where he suddenly got quiet and pissed off. The next day after that we hung out again and he was cold at first but by the end of the day we were talking and laughing and it felt like we were bonding, like old times. When I went home he even asked if I got home safe. Also while we were together yesterday I heard him tell someone on the phone he was chilling with his gf, but I can't read into that too much because hes still acting hot and cold. His emotions right now are unstable and unpredictable, I've never seen him so confused, hurt, or upset.I realize he is in a lot of pain because I can't prove I didn't cheat on him. It's literally my word against the word of an entire crowd. But it's been three whole days and every day that things aren't normal feels like an eternity! How long will it take before he can let the drama of that night go?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 July 2010): Honey he is a grown man. its not your job to bend over backwards to convince him of yor innocence. You've already told him that you did nothing wrong, if he doesn't believe you then perhaps its best you both move on from each other and date other people. Clearly your relationship wasn't built on trust to begin with.
P.S- some friends you got! absolutely unbelieveable!
Good luck
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2010): You say you left and came back. Then you say, you left by yourself.
Where did you go? And why? I hope you're not leaving out important details because you did go with that ex boyfriend guy? Where did he go and it just happened to be at the same time as you?
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A
female
reader, Kakapo017 +, writes (13 July 2010):
 All people are different in how long they need to sort things through their head and forgive. From your story it sounds like he still cares for you, but is afraid that what others have told him are true. You can reassure him by not sounding as if you are apologizing, it will give him a reason to think you did indeed do what you said you didn't. As you said just do things to bond with him, you both will need time to get over this. Usually, it takes a whole week before a person begins to forget what had taken place, but it could take longer before things return to normal. I know first hand waiting for a things to go back to normal feels like forever,but there is no standard for how long a person needs to heal. Just know you are not alone and find comfort in other things such as friends or family to help get you through this.
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