A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:I have been dating a woman who strips for a living at a club. I liked her from the start and she and I have good chemistry… the sex is great. She and I met at the club she works at. After I came to the club just to see her and after buying a couple dozen dances she agreed to go out with me…we’ve been seeing each other for two months now. I go to the club to see her still, but she tells me she doesn’t want me to be there every night. And the couple nights a week I have this aching jealousy. It’s okay seeing her dance naked on a strip pole (the club’s in Canada, full nudity is ok). But when I see her dance on other guy’s laps I get so crazy inside, like I want to just grab her and punch these guys out. I took a friend of mine to the club once and he deliberately taunted me by having a few dances with her right in my face, squeezing her butt and everything. Oh yeah, I got into it with him on the way home. So here I am, I really love her, and I can’t ask her to quit her job. She makes three times the money I do, how can I keep up with that kind of money. And all I feel is jealous when she’s wiggling her naked butt on other guy’s faces. I can’t take this, but I love her….What can I do?
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male
reader, NotTheHallMonitor +, writes (24 April 2011):
The truth is, it's a fine job and it always depends on the person or personality type. If your thing is loose and very fun women, than having a Stripper as your girlfriend is the best thing. I would enjoy every day of it in fact, while not even caring about the cheating since that is pretty obvious it happens. After all, I'm a loose connected guy and I should be able to enjoy anything that is carefree like that. I would not ask her to stop, I'd encourage her. You on the opposite hand, are always uncomfortable with it since you looked for a serious relationship. It is not possible to have one that is truly "serious", so that environment likely will never feel like a fit for you. Nothing wrong with that.
A
female
reader, louloublahblah +, writes (15 January 2008):
I am a dancer. In fact, my boyfriend had a big argument with me about I am being an exotic dancer. I agree, it is hard for him to deal with. I let my boyfriend came to the club one time and he couldn't stand 5' to see me dance pole naked with hundred eyes on me and left with angry face, even I gave free lap dance for him 5' before that, since then I never let him come to my club. I truly love him and not even want to leave him for any guys. Any dancers who really care for their boyfriend ..they really don't want their boyfriend come to work and make a roots there day by day...to look at them when they work with this uncomfortable job..and second they seat and talk to you and not be able to make money and they have to pay the club's fees after all. It's a work place, Mr.Root.
You could come for few minutes and leave that you will make her even want you more...support her job like take her to work or pick her up sometimes and ask her how her day..she will stick with you because she know she will never find a man who accept her job like that like my boyfriend said if I find the man who accept my job then I should hold him like I win a big lottery and That's true..
I don't think your girfriend like you for money since you only have couple lap dances with her. If she wants to..she could ask you to go back for some more lap dances and room and make money without dating,. When you know that she could not live without you then ask her to change another job or go to school and have a future with you then definately she will change..
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A
male
reader, defstar187 +, writes (23 December 2007):
im in the same boat you are except i def love my girl
we been thru this on and off for three years, the lapdancing kills me so i suggest you dont go to the club, why make it even worse , i never go to see my girl strip
she cant quit for you she must quit for herself
if you love her stick with it as long as you can
it's the hardest thing i ever had to do in 31 years
but if you peace her she's still going to be stripping
just not hanging out with you
not are strippers are cheaters and they dont play every man in their life, she might really like you
"strippers are humans and need love too"
its a double edged sword you like having a beautiful woman but you got to share her, as long as she's not taking yr money then yr cool, im 50/50 everyday about the lapdance issue but if you can trust her.......then hold on for dear life.you wont have a normal relationship but whats normal
i feel like she cheats on me when she lapdances and that hurts but she's not doing it to hurt you
its yr fault if you fell for her, she was a dancer when you met
i cant even breath untill after 2am when i know shes not lapdanceing i go thru it everynight but it's the price i pay
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 December 2007): I stumbled upon this page looking for answers of my own. It seems like my boyfriend has the same problem.We have been dating for 3 years.We met at a club where I worked. During the past three years I kinda tapered off working there,but have since returned full time. He knows that coming there angers himself and makes me very uncomfortable. It fuels many arguments and we sometimes dont speak for days. My theory is...out of sight out of mind. Stop going there!! $600-700 in a 5 hour shift is more than I make in my "real" job in two whole weeks. If you like her alot more than you like her job then just keep yourself out of the club and get on with your relationship.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the replies so far...I just wanted to make a correction. I didn't mean to say I love her, but I really like her a lot, maybe its notch beore you can call it love. I don't know, i guess I just wish she wasn't stripping, cause maybe then i could make the move and call it love. I guess its true she could be seeing other guys outside of work, but Ive been with her on most her nights off. SHe also goes to school, so this job is important for her to pay for it, I can't maker her quit, at least now. Keep the replies comin...
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2007): why would you fall in love with a stripper and then expect her to change? if you want a good relationship find a nice girl and stay out of strip clubs, you get what you 'pay' for......btw, how many other guys is she 'dating'? I wouldn't be as worried about her dancing as her life outside of work.
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A
male
reader, Yos  +, writes (19 November 2007):
 You either have to accept her as she is, and get over the stripping, or leave her. It depends how strong you are and whether you can cope with the jealousy without taking it out on her. But don't feel too bad if you can't cope, very few men could, I know I certainly couldn't.
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A
male
reader, eddie  +, writes (19 November 2007):
 You can't make an apple an orange. She's a stripper and that's her level of morality. I'm from the Niagara Falls area so I know the places you're talking about. Those women are not the kind you want to take home to mom. They're entitled to act as they please but if you're looking for Mr's Cleaver..... that ain't her. I'd look elsewhere for a partner. You're only fooling yourself here. Most of these women are takers. They make their living off men's weakness....sex. Good for them, bad for you. You're giving her all your money so she takes off her clothes. I'd rather have a woman who takes off her clothes because she wants to do it.
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