A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My problem is jealousy. I've always been a jealous person, ever since I was about 5. I'm 15 now, and nothing has changed.The main thing that makes me most jealous is when I see my friends having a great time without me. It just makes me feel like i'm not needed or wanted, even though I might be. It's so self-centred to think that I'm needed constantly, but I can't help it! I know that my friends don't need me to have a good time, but somehow I still manage to get worked up about it.Is there any way I can control my jealousy before it gets worse? It's starting to get me down :(Thanks.
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 June 2008): Just try and attend as many of your friend's gatherings as possible, and try and make new friends. So even if you happen to miss some event, then it'll be because you were seeing other friends. and try and laugh with them about stuff when they retell it to you, try and find it amusing and don't let it get you down that you weren't there.
A
female
reader, TrillianMcRed  +, writes (15 June 2008):
We're all jealous through life.. I get jealous when my friends meet up without me.. The best way to deal with it is find a hobby with yourself.. Trust me, you're 15 when you get older you'll yearn to find that time with yourself and you won't.. If you like music, pick up a musical instrument or learn a new language.. With a skill to go with a hobby you can watch other people get jealous.. Try joining an activity group and making new friends.. Have friend circles of people from school, neighbourhood and activities, you'll never be left out.. Occupation is the best way to deal with anything and a hobby is always a good thing as long as it's healthy :)
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A
male
reader, rcn  +, writes (15 June 2008):
 Your jealousy is a form of dependancy. It can be real harmful, especially in a marriage. That's where you find someone who wants to go somewhere, the jealous one does not, so no one gets too.
Your on track. You know it's not about them, it's about you. That's a start. Start telling yourself it's okay for them to have fun, when you're not with them. You'd rather them have fun than be sad. You're in charge of your behavior and your feelings. It's about changing the way you view what's bothering you.
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