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How do I talk to my Mom about birth control when she doesn't want me having sex?

Tagged as: Family, Sex, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (8 July 2009) 8 Answers - (Newest, 9 July 2009)
A female United States age 26-29, anonymous writes:

im 14 turning 15 in a couple months...i've had sex twice but my mom thinks i've done it once. she doesnt want me to continue having sex because she's afraid of me getting pregnant of an std but i want to keep doing it...im being safe i've used a condom both times. but now im thinking about getting birth control just in case. but i dont know how to talk to her about it.

View related questions: condom, std

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A reader, anonymous, writes (9 July 2009):

ijust think your too young to be having sex, that said if your being resposible then good to hear,you know that your more likely to get cervical cancer the younger you start to have reg sex.. just something to think about.

if you cant talk to your mum go to a nurse and talk it over with her you have your whole life to have sex why not just enjoy being a kid

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (9 July 2009):

Tell her you want to get put on birth control because of your periods lol She's a woman she would understand that periods suck xD

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A female reader, SirenaBlusera Mexico +, writes (9 July 2009):

SirenaBlusera agony auntYou shouldn't be having sex at all, but you should still be informed about birth control. if your mom won't talk to you about it, then you need to see a doctor, nurse or PA.

Remember, ANYTHING is better than un-protected sex, BUT... only abstinence will fully protect you.

I think you have a right to know the facts, but it's not right for you to be having sex now. I know you don't want to hear this, but you need to resist that urge to have sex. No one your age should have to deal with pregnancy/STDs, and the only guarantee you won't, is to be abstinent.

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A female reader, airn230 United States +, writes (9 July 2009):

If your mom won't help you, then I would suggest you go through family planning. There are free clinic that work on donations. They will keep it completely confidential, and your mom won't know as long you don't leave your pills lying around. Please, Please, Please, always use a condom, there are even STDs now that don't have symptoms.

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A female reader, ugh101 United States +, writes (9 July 2009):

ugh101 agony auntok depentant on the state, a parent is not needed.

Here in Missouri i can get the pill without my parents knowing about it. Because it it confedial. But that would also mean that i would have to pay for it.

Look up your state laws on it or call the docs and see if they no.

But birth control would be a good option just as long as you know that you have to take it when you are supose to every day for it to wrk.

Godd LuckXX

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A reader, anonymous, writes (9 July 2009):

It's a tough conversation, one she doesn't want to have, where you're going to have to say things she doesn't want to hear.

I presume you've decided you like sex. What your mom needs to hear is that you've tried it, you like it, and you intend to do it again *in a responsible fashion*. You want her help in being responsible -- you want the pill as a back up, but you're going to continue to use condoms because you don't want an STD. Right?

At some point parents have to realize that it's your body, and ultimately you're going to decide what happens to it. If they can't accept it and help you and guide you in being careful, your risk of a bad outcome is greater. They don't want that.

But whether or not you get the nerve to have that conversation, for goodness sake keep insisting on condoms.

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A female reader, Lalala123lalala United Kingdom +, writes (9 July 2009):

It can always be a difficult topic of conversation, especially if your mum doesnt approve of you having sex. however, my story is, my mum found out on accident and MADE me go on birth control (the contraceptive pill). so i suppouse i got it easy. but try and sit down with her n talk to her, explain you just want the pill (or whatever contraception u wanna use) just in case and explain if she doesn't want you to get pregnant then isn't it better for you to use birth control? Also remember to always use a condom. STD's are more common than you think hun!!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (9 July 2009):

maybe tell her your friend is on it and says it really helps with period cramps?

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