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writes:I met this girl almost 20 years ago during a vacation and we have kept in touch mostly by letters ever since. We have seen each other a few times over the years and call each other from time to time. Recently she called me and wanted to start up a relationship which we did. I visited her where she lives (over 300 miles from me) and things went well. Then we got closer on the phone. When she next visited me things went great and I told her I loved her. She reacted by being upset and saying it was too soon. Now several weeks have passed and she doesn't return my calls or rarely my text messages. How can I repair the relationship? Or is it too late?
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 April 2008): Give it time. Don't rush it, even if it's 20 years. She knows how you feel now... either she will accept it and build from there, or refuse it, and not talk to you anymore, mostly to not hurt you. Wish I knew how girls worked, I have had my share of girls get close to me, then I opened my stupid mouth... good luck man.
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female
reader, birdynumnums  +, writes (8 April 2008):
 I love that answer, LonelyTwo! "Love her as a person!".
If you are willing to continue talking with her and cool it down, I think it's worth a chance. Not entirely sure that it would definitely be "over", like L2 said, she probably just got a bit freaked out. I'd give it one more try.
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 April 2008): Text her, apologize, that if she was upset by your love comment, that you meant "love her as a person".
You may have freaked her out. So you've known each other for 20 years, and something as small as this scares her away? Maybe your better off. She may have some emotional problems from a bad past relationship, if so, then it is probably over. Don't take it out on yourself, you gave from the heart, it was you and you were rejected, so move on, I think it might be for the best. Maybe she is what is called "high maintenance"? Don't know, you provided little history so I'm only going by what you wrote, and I've had dates like this.
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