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How do I get her away from her computer to pay attention to me?

Tagged as: Dating, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (15 April 2007) 2 Answers - (Newest, 15 April 2007)
A male United States age 30-35, *k06 writes:

Every time I visit my girlfriend, she seems far more interested in her computer and different sites such as facebook and myspace than she is of me. Believe me when I say I am not a needy person, and it doesnt bother me if she hops online to check something... but this sometimes goes for hours... Any time I try to say anything she gets mad, and acts like I'm being a jerk. I never say anything rudely, as I am not a rude person. I just dont understand, and I cant talk to her about it. What do you think?

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A male reader, Royofthe Rovers United Kingdom +, writes (15 April 2007):

Royofthe Rovers agony auntThe internet is there all day, all week, all the time. Why she feels the need to use it when you are there is being fairly unreasonable.

She needs to understand that you have come round to visit her, you need talk about this and get things sorted.

If she cant understand you viewpoint which is a valid one, then you need seriously think about your relationship. A healthy relationship is one that can change and adapt to each others needs, she is not doing this at the moment.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (15 April 2007):

Hi,

You need to agree some terms in how you spend your time with each other. For example, it would seem a good idea to agree that when you are together that neither of you use the Internet unless you are doing it to find something together. Websites such as facebook and myspace are there for both of you when you are not around each other. If your girlfriend is not interested in coming to these sort of terms then perhaps she is not interested in quite the same relationship as you are. Either way, you need to find resolution on this. The longer the issue goes on the more you will think she is neglecting you and the more she will think you are too demanding for her.

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