A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am a 22 year old virgin, worse I haven't had a girlfriend since the 7th grade and as far as I know only one girl has been interested since. I lost over 75lbs and today am almost at the point of having a 6 pack. I changed my clothes and hair several times, and I've never had any luck. The primary reason has to be social ineptitude but (no offense to anyone) most women aren't attracted to honesty and honor, they're looking for assholes. I had the opportunity one night about 6 months ago and I didn't do it, partially because I'm afraid, but mostly because we were both drunk and I'm not that way.I write this because I'm probably going to go to what passes for a club in a couple hours. The thought of going out just depresses me because I know how it will end; the thought of staying here in front of my computer is worse so I only see one option. I've become so depressed by my own social awkwardness it's driven me so close to the edge I don't know why I keep going on. All I ask of anyone that reads this is to tell me, what do I do? How do I climb out of this pit of despair before I can't reach the top anymore?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 January 2011): Be proud of yourself for losing weight, sprucing yourself up, and not losing your virginity while drunk. You don't have to try so hard or be so hard on yourself. If you feel socially awkward, start taking little steps at a time to improve it. Trying to go from the bottom of the pit to out of the pit all at once doesn't work, and just makes you feel worse, right? So try getting out more with your friends. Don't focus so hard on getting a girlfriend; focus on having a good time and meeting/talking to people. I also agree with Advice_Man-find things that you like to do, and do them. Sometimes you have to work on yourself before you can add someone else to your life, but the good part is, you're going the right direction.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 January 2011): I'm just like you bro! Best thing for people like us to do is join a dating site. Based on women's profile, you can gauge what kind of person they are - far better than going into a bar/club, getting wasted, and hooking up with a drunk hoping it could turn into something more than a 1-night-stand.
Best of luck!
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A
male
reader, Advice_man +, writes (16 January 2011):
 What is your reason of dispair? Women!
Try to find other interests in life than women! Then you will be a happier man.
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A
female
reader, SillyB +, writes (16 January 2011):
 hun you're only in your 20's, men don't mature and build confidence till their late 20's and into their 30's. My studly bf didn't lose his V card till he was 27 and even then it took acouple more years for him to build his confidence up to have 'game' with girls. It'll take some time and practice, nothing to worry about.
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