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How can you tell if someone is cheating? I suspect my dad is, on my mum!

Tagged as: Cheating, Family<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (29 August 2007) 4 Answers - (Newest, 30 August 2007)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

How can you tell if someone is cheating on their wife...i suspect my dad may be cheating on my mom with a close relative.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (30 August 2007):

Do talk to your Dad, even if it is just giving him a hint. You could invent a "someone you know's Dad" and say he is having and affair with whoever. Then say his son thinks he should tell his Mum. Look him straight in the eye and ask him what he would advise that you do. Then tell him that you would give the person a chance to stop and then tell your Mum if it did not, if it was you.

He may give you the chance to talk about it and reassure you. If he looks afraid and avoids the subject you may be right. In that case I would clearly tell him that you are really worried that he is having an affair with whoever and that you will tell your mother if you find it to be true. Tell him that you will definatley find out, if it is.

Poor you, but you could nip this in the bud if you do something. Your Dad is being a stupid man to put you in this position.

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A male reader, Frank B Kermit Canada +, writes (30 August 2007):

Frank B Kermit agony auntStay out of it. This is between your parents and not for you to get involved with.

If you MUST get involved, talk to the parent you think is cheating, but I would advise against it.

Fact is, you have NO IDEA if they themselves have an open relationship, or have some understanding that you cannot grasp becuase you see them as your parents, and not as a sexual couple.

-Frank B Kermit

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A male reader, daglish Uganda +, writes (30 August 2007):

daglish agony auntNow honey thats dangerous businness. Involving yourself in ur parents sexual issues can be disastrous especially if you begin spying on either. I would love you to keep your distance unless your dad brings a woman home for sex in your mother's absence

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A male reader, DJ8433 United States +, writes (29 August 2007):

DJ8433 agony auntIt's more difficult for a third person to tell because you may not notice nuances of change. Typically things like, not having your cell phone on when moms around, being on the computer and getting nervous when others are around like acting fidgety. Mom can see smaller things like not being as attentive, not kissing her or making love the same way. There are websites on this matter, if you google search on how can i tell he's cheating. If you suspect him, you are probably in a better position to follow him and find out for sure. I say for sure, like he goes to a womans apartment for 30 minutes or picks up a hooker on the street. You have to see something, and not just suspect it. I suggest you confront him if you SEE him in an act of the above stupidity. If your mom would stay with him anyways then it won't do any good to tell her first. Dad may stop out of shame because you found put, but he might not if mom doesn't do anything. If you tell him first, then go to mom after and she doesn't do anything, he might think you didn't tell her. It really doesn't matter though as long as he stops.

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