A
female
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*tarisrocks
writes:when ever my bf is at home (we long distance) i start to hate him every small thing he does i hate him for. if he forgets to put xxx in his texts i hate him. when he tells me he be online when he knows im at work i hate him. when he takes 6 weeks to reply to my letters i hate him and when he show no sympathny when i tell him im feeling upset i hate himhow can i stop this hate coz i love him to pieces when we together
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 July 2007): I don't think you know the meaning of the word 'hate'.If you seem to 'hate' him so much then why are you together with him? Because you don't hate him. Think about all the good times you've shared together, think about how excited you must have felt when you first got with him, think about your first kiss; did you 'hate' him then?If you live far away from each other then it's going to be difficult for him to be giving you attention constantly. And you can't just say you hate him everytime he does something you don't like. You need to re-evaluate your relationship and figure out whether putting kisses on a text message really matters because there are way more important aspects to a relationship than that.
A
female
reader, deejuliet  +, writes (24 July 2007):
 I understand how you are feeling. When I am away from my boyfriend (and we live in the same town) I miss him. Missing him makes me sad. Being sad makes me think negative thoughts. Negative thoughts make me focus on everything bad that has happened between us. Then I get angry and sad AT him instead of just ABOUT him. Then we end up in a fight. He tells me to just focus on the postive and maximize my happiness. To look forward to the next time we will be together instead of dwelling on the fact that we arent together right now. That can be very difficult to do if you dont feel the love. I feel that that is just being in denial to reality. And OUR reality is that we have some serious problems that, as much as we love each other, I dont think we will be able to work out. If that is not the problem for you, then it might work for you. Just focus on the next time you will be together, how much you are looking forward to spending time with him. I know you miss him and this causes you to lash out, but it isnt helping is it?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 July 2007): i kno the feeling. im exactly the same. and i starded liking another guy. but when im with my bf i dnt even look at other guxs. hes gr8. anyway. why dont you try explaing to him how u feel. i did it and it goes beter now. we still argue alot but not as much as we use to. and now hes coming to live where i do in january. i hope this helped a lil.
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