A
female
age
36-40,
*atie23
writes:Hi guys. I posted on here a while ago about the fact that I've completely and utterly fallen for my best friend, http://www.dearcupid.org/question/i-really-dont-understand-what-he-is-thinking.html. Anyway he doesn't feel the same way which is hard to deal with but obviously I accept, but I seem to be finding it impossible to get over him. It doesn't help that we talk a lot, and please don't tell me that I should stop seeing him until these feelings pass because pretty much all our friends are mutual ones so unless I become a recluse that's not gonna happen. I just find it so hard to go out with him and listen to him chatting to guy friends about girls he's got with or watching him hit on girls in clubs. What makes it worse is often when he's drunk he'll get very flirty and touchy feely with me even though we've talked about how this makes the situation harder for me. It makes me feel bad as I feel like I'm the one he comes to when he's not having any luck with other girls. I really am trying to move on, trying to talk to him less and not be flirty when I do, I've even been out on a couple of dates with other guys, but as soon as I see him again I'm back to square one. Please help!
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female
reader, Red591  +, writes (20 September 2010):
 Geez I don't know what to tell you cause the old saying "out of sight, out of mind" works fantastic for me. is there no way to not see him? If you can't not see him than try searching for the things that make you mad about him like coming to you when the other girls are gone...or not respecting how you feel when he flirts. These are signs of a disrespectful guy and that is no dream man. I would still try to distance yourself as much as possible. Try getting a different social circle. If not seeing your friends as much (at least till you are past this) is what it takes to heal than you have to do it.
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