A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:How can a single mom get a boyfriend?Im pretty active, I go to school and work 24 hours a week. I have a beautiful 16 month old son. The dad and me are still ok but he lives 4 hours away. It seems like the only guys I can attract now are guys who already have kids, have been in trouble with the law, guys with no car or no real money.. How can I attract the manly men that want to take me out and wine and dine me? What would guys think is sexy?
View related questions:
money Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2012): Ah! The irony of a single mother complaining about only being able to attract men with kids.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 June 2012): Lower your standards first of all. Most Men who will want to date you will be younger, and just because a man doesn't have a decent job or car doesn't mean that he is worthless. Look for who they are at heart and not what they can afford. most men now a days are a lot poorer do to the economy and job scarcity.
Don't be looking to just sponge off someone. Look for who they are as a person not their income. that is a ridiculous reason to find a boyfriend. maybe it is time you started paying the bills. if anything, look for a man that you might need to help out a little. that way you will feel better about yourself and not rely on anyone else.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 June 2012): How can a single (young) mom get a boyfriend? Lower her standards.
Sorry to say this, but most 'manly men' who you're looking for will consider you a bit of a fool. Being single with a child, especially at a young age, indicates poor judgment - something alpha male-types despise.
Your best bet? Consider dating someone in a similar situation as you - you'll both be better able to relate.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 June 2012): I believe you can always get what you want if you are willing to put in the hard work and time.
Don't wait for life to find you. You have to go out and look for what you want and pursue it like there is no tomorrow.
These days, successful guys do not want a girl that is way below his level. They want somebody that has the ability to contribute even though they are the one that always foots the bill. If you want someone that is willing to wine and dine you, you might want to consider upgrading your skills and social status to that level through hard work. When you achieve that status and who knows who you will meet.
Good luck in your journey to success.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 June 2012): well to me you sound a bit desperate i myself am a single parent to a beautiful 7 year old boy i had him a lot younger than you had yours i finished school looked after my little boy and when he was 4 yrs old i met my boyfriend he himself is a single dad i think its easier to get along with someone who already has a child as they know the situation that your in and it isnt easy to find a suitable man who doesnt have any children that want to get with someone that has a child. your main priority right now is to look after your child and not look to get wined and dined im fairly sure when the time is right you will meet someone when u least expect it.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 June 2012): most guys your age group don't want to date somebody who already has a kid when they don't have kids themselves I myself don' wanna date guys who have kids, cause most of the time we hang out the kid comes along too, plus there's all the drama with the mother of the child, so a young, single person would rather be with someone as unattached as themselves, then it's easier for you to date guys who already have kids . I'm not saying it's impossible to find a childless guy who will accept you with a child, just that it's difficult. Right now I think you should focus on your studies, and achieving the things you mentioned you wanted in a guy, that is, a car, money, a job... Once you have the lifestyle you want through your own work, you'll start meeting people of the same social standing.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 June 2012): It's going to be very hard to find a guy that's willing to raise somebody else's kid when he doesn't have any.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 June 2012): "How can a single mom get a boyfriend?"With great difficulty. Most guys your age who are looking to date (as opposed to looking for sex) aren't interested in playing surrogate step-dad to a kid who isn't theirs."How can I attract the manly men that want to take me out and wine and dine me?"Again, with great difficulty. From a guy POV, presence of a kid greatly reduces the payoff for wining and dining. "What would guys think is sexy?"Women who don't have kids. At the risk of coming across as moralistic old fart, if you're the mother of a 16-month old, enrolled in school, working part-time, and you and long-distance baby daddy are "still OK," then you shouldn't be in the market for a boyfriend. I'm old-fashioned enough to believe that having a child with a guy is a lifetime commitment in and of itself; sorry, but if you wanted to pursue an active social/dating life in your early twenties (as most guys and girls do as nature intended), then you shouldn't have had an out-of-wedlock kid so young. Being a full-time single parent takes precedence over getting laid, among other youthful pleasures that you effectively gave up when you chose to have a baby.
...............................
A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (29 June 2012):
 Are you looking for a boyfriend or a meal ticket?
Start working on becoming the woman men other than those you describe will be attracted to, get yourself educated, get a job that will give you real money and the ability to live the lifestyle that includes a decent car. When you are working and earning at a certain level you will meet others at that same level, and your chances of meeting a wining dining man will increase.
...............................
A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice + ♥, writes (29 June 2012):
 Sounds like you have kids and no "real" money. A bit pushy to demand of others what you don't have yourself. On the other hand I do think you should look for manliness. That should be findable. A guy willing to "date" at your age is going to be pretty rare, though I do keep encouraging that idea.
As to what these guys find attractive, I'm too long out of the game. Confidence, and femininity are always god bets.
FA
...............................
|
