A
female
age
36-40,
*ust_keep_swimming
writes:Ok. So about 3 years ago, I met this amazing guy, and we went out for about 3 months. He broke it off and then 4 months later he wanted me back and we decided to see how things went. About a month later, I kissed a friend, and felt so bad about it I broke up with the guy, but didnt tell him about the kiss, just that i wasnt in the right place to have a relationship just then. He understood and we left on really good terms. I didnt see him for 2 1/2 years, until my sister saw him and texted him. We all met up for a drink, and then me and him met up a few times just the two of us. I told him I missed him and wanted him back and he said he felt the same way. So we started seeing each other again. But now he's ignoring me, and i don't understand why. Last time I saw him, everything was wonderful, and then nothing! I've texted him, tried calling him, left him a message on facebook, but he's not reply to anything, and hangs up on me when I call.What do I do?? I really like this guy, I care about him so much, he's always cared alot about me too, and never done anything to hurt me, I really didnt think he'd just ignore me without an explaination. If its that he's changed his mind, why doesnt he tell me? He's a really caring, calm, gentle guy, and he's always upfront with people, so why the sudden silence? And how do I deal with it?
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male
reader, pinkstar +, writes (27 August 2009):
This is an old question written last year - did he ever contact you?Exactly the same is happening to me right now - met up with first love, instigated BY HIM, said he wanted to buy me flowers and was reminissing etc etc doting over me. Now nothing. i heard he was back in town he has not contacted me at all - let alone send me flowers!! I sent friendly text, called (rang out) and finally sent facebook msg as that way can check hes been online and got my message. NOTHING!!''Waited'' narcotically on edge for 2 days. Finally given up ''waiting'' on the unknown as could be waiting forever. Trying to ''draw a line under it'' and pretend to do loads of positive things..in pretending to be happy I am actually starting to feel genuinly hapapier without him.i am my own worst enemy as I know I paint an angelic picture of him although truth is he is a rat !
A
female
reader, Just_keep_swimming +, writes (27 January 2008):
Just_keep_swimming is verified as being by the original poster of the questionForgot to mention, he's off to Texas for a month or two on work matters in the next week or so...but he knew that when we started seeing each other again, and it didnt stop him...
Who knows...I'm just going to get on with life and if he wants to see me again, then Im hoping he'll just contact me, and wont think he's blown it :S
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 January 2008): You really can't know why he is ignoring you unless you get an opportunity to ask him....could it be that he is already in a relationship and did not tell you?
I would STOP trying to text him, call him or hunt him down, guys don't like this when they stop calling you, they want you to stop calling them, let him do the chasing...he may be backing off because he likes you a lot and does not want to appear desperate (although hanging up on you does not make sense unless you are calling him 5 times a day and leaving messages) or there may be some other reason like a death in the family....just leave him alone and see if he doesn't contact you...in the mean time get on with life and do the things you like to do....that way you have something fun to talk about if and when you do see him.....
It sounds to me like all of the I miss yous and let's get back together may have been a bit too soon and he is worried that you will think you have an instant relationship and he has no say so in where it goes....so just give him some breathing room and I bet he will pop up again, hopefully in less time than 2 years.
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