A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My head is all over the place in my relationship.I live with my girlfriend of 18 months. We also have her older brother living with us. He works shifts and generally keeps himself to himself.She works all kinds of shifts, all over the place, during the week and over weekends. She says she is always tired. She doesnt get paid much so money is tight.She suffered from depression but is off her pill for a long time now as she said it just made her worse. She has the odd downer days but everybody does.I try to do as much around the house as possible after i have been to work and come back from the gym to help her not feel so tired, to the point where i feel i have no time to relax and i'm exhausted.We hardly ever socialise together due to her shift work or money, so we usually just stay in. I find it hard to have time out with friends as they are away at Uni.I talk to her about not seeing her much in the week or at weekends, and she agrees that we need to spend more time together.Yet almost every other weekend we seem to looking after her nephew 12, so we cant really have any private time together. Her sister will also call her at all times day or night to get my girlfriend to discipline him. Which i dont agree with.I feel i do alot of work for our relationship, when things get abit rough i try and work things out.When we alone, like the occasional weekend without her nephew and her brother is out or on holiday without the stresses of her nephew playing up or getting calls fomr her sister to discipline him at all times, we get along brialliantly, she acts like she did when i was first attracted to her.the thing that annoys me the most, which she knows, is that we dont get these time very often. She knows and agrees to things i say would improve out relationship, but does do any work to carry them through.She told me her ex used to pick her up alot and take her where he lived, I can see why he did that, just so he could spend some time with her away from all the stress from her family.sometimes i think she compares me to her ex, but we are very different people.She is close to her family, and i dont mind that, i can have fun with her sister and brother etc. she is also close to her friends.i feel sometimes that i'm quite low on her list of prioritise, which hurts me alot, as she is at the top of mine.
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