A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I meet this guy in december. Fell in love with him at the moment. But my problem is I'm a good girl just started clubbing and drinking and I'm also kinda shy He's a player. He got out of a 4 year relationship and he really liked her. We made out like a month ago but the next day he was with another girl Its just perfect, my family loves him and his family loves me We have so much fun. I decided I'm gonna do whatever takes to make him fall for me. I'm 21 and never fell in love like that. He also got scared when he found out I was a virgin What do I do, I'll not rest 'till he's in love with me I want him to understand that he can have fun with me. Thanks
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clubbing, fell in love, player, shy Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (8 June 2010):
He won't fall for you. He'll use you, but he won't fall for you. You're setting yourself up for a major failure. The bad boy won't change and settle down.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 June 2010): You're setting yourself up for failure. Let me lay out the usual story here:
You sound like you're gonna give your virginity to this player in an attempt to make him want you more. You swear it's nothing serious at the time, maybe just FWB. But of course your feelings get even stronger after you sleep with him. He just loses interest soon after that (because that's how the player's personality and sexual attractions normally work.) He gets spooked by your attempts to make it more serious and really starts pulling away. Pretty soon you see him with the next inexperienced girl ready to make the same mistake. After a lot of crying nights you eventually realize it's never going to happen and you are left hurt for months.
After a long time you get back out there looking for someone different from the player and you end up with a better guy. When that relationship become serious you are happier although you always regret not waiting to lose your virginity with him instead of feeling like you wasted it on the player who didn't deserve it.
I have seen this story play out many times. I can't think of one single time it ever had a happy ending with the girl and the player.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 June 2010): Why do you want a player?? You cannot make anyone fall in love with you. Either they will or they won't fall for you but it's not in your hands.Be careful you might end up getting hurt...Him making out with you and the next day with another should be a major red flag!Be careful.Good luck.
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