A
female
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anonymous
writes:My bf of 2 months turned me down for sex last nite and now im paranoid he doesnt like me anymore. I startd kissing him and he said 'no I dont want it' and I turned round and didnt talk to him for the rest of the evening - I was really upset as hes usually up for it so I dont know what I did wrong. I feel really silly for getting moody with him over it too, what I should say to him?
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 September 2007): You might consider yourself lucky that you're with a up-to-date guy who has down moments. When I was young, I was always ready for some sex. I was also an emotional wreck wrapped up in a hard shell of denial, and kind of mean.
A
male
reader, Abacadaba +, writes (7 September 2007):
 Seriosuly, dont worry, maybe he doesnt wanna rush into it, or maybe he was just shy, ive done it before to girls i really like, sex is one of those things, some guys wanna get as much as they can, others want it to be special, same goes for girls. I wouldnt worry about it personally, if hes still with you, then he likes you, simple as that.
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A
male
reader, Saree Love +, writes (7 September 2007):
There are many situations when a boy turns down a girl.
- when he is in a down mood
- when he is focused on something else
- when he feels he is doing something wrong (guilt consciousness)
- when he does not want to engage in sex for some period of time
- when he feels the girl can not be trusted
- when he feels the girl is trying to boss over him
- when he feels the girl is misusing relationship with him
- when he has some one else in the mind
Best recourse is:
Have patience. Have pure love. Many boys are emotional. They like love beyond sex. Once he gets comfortable again, you will have a wonderful time.
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A
female
reader, Evangeline +, writes (7 September 2007):
 Heya,
Yeh it is upsetting when this happens .. but it does happen to everyone, and is nothing to get upset about! Its absoultely nothing to do with him not liking you anymore, he simply just didnt feel like it! People steriotype young men to be totally sex obsessed, when in fact their sex drive can be realy affected by their moods. For example if ur guy was feeling a bit down last night .. u know perhaps he was worrying about something small like school/college/work etc it could just really put him off wanting to be intimate with you. This is very different from young women, who tend to 'grin and bare it' more, little things dont upset their sex drive as much. Keep an eye on him for clues i.e. does he seem down generally or worried about something; but dont quiz him about it, it will make him seem more distant.
If that situation ever happens again, its much more painless for you both if u dont get moody; if he says no, give him a kiss on the cheak and go and do something else. Its your way of saying that you understand him, and he'll appriciate you so much more for that! good luck .. and remember its totally normal for him not to want it sometimes and that its nothing to do with you!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 September 2007): You say nothing, he rejected you remember. I wouldn't make any moves on him at all for quite sometime and give him the headache excuse a few times, when he's up for it. That should make him think about things...
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