A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:So today, I confessed to the guy I like that I like him. He's anti-social and shy so I wasn't expecting much, but we talked for two whole hours and he was really nice. He didn't make it awkward. When I would flirt with him, he would blush, smile, and encourage it. He also told me to text him at least 4 times and mentioned it when we said good bye too. But he didn't even say that he liked me back ... So I'm confused as to why I should text him first? He has my number too. I don't want to come across as clingy or desperate.
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (20 May 2014):
 He has your number
you made it clear you like him
he told you to text...
you could text him to start but then I'd let it go...
and be careful... he has the upper hand here...knowing you like him and probably being aware that lots of younger women will have sex as a way to make a guy care more for her (cause that's how women's brains often work) and it won't do the same for him... for him he would get laid, enjoy it and move on...
if you want more than to be a bed buddy to this guy...
ya gotta let him chase you... and not put out right away...
if all you want is fun and games then go for it.
it's sad that even in the 21st century we have to "play games" to find a mate but while technology has advanced, human nature has not.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 May 2014): He's at odds with his feelings. Every guy is and we as women have to draw it out of them! If he encouraged the flirting, he's interested. Maybe he just didn't want to dedicate himself by telling you he likes you too. By not telling you, he can back out at any time. Men are like that.
YOLO!
Text him! If it's been a few months and he's still not saying anything, count your losses. You don't want someone that's going to string you along like that because that means he's going to be like that with everything.
It hasn't been long though, so don't worry about that yet. Initiate texts, and don't read to much into what he says because men don't text like girls do; a lot of it comes off as cold and it seems like they aren't really interested. That's just the whole male race.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 May 2014): Okay, now he knows how you feel, and you're the one still wanting to know. Wait, and see if he texts you back.
You already opened up. You will teach him to be less anti-social and more forth-coming by not always initiating conversations with him. He asks you to text him, which is okay; but he's putting all the responsibility on you.
Never assume all the responsibility of showing boys how you feel. They have to give something back. Ignore him until you hear from him.
If he can't give back, you're wasting your time and shouldn't make any excuses for him.
You should be spending your time with boys you don't have to fix. There is nothing special about liking boys with problems. It doesn't make you a special girl by doing so. You are setting yourself up for getting hurt. I'm going to warn you now. You'll have to learn on your own. Boys like him are like a furrow cat or a stray dog. They seem calm enough to let you get close. Then they bite.
Being shy is fine. People diagnosed with anti-social behavior, or disorders, are unpredictable. They can sometimes be dangerous, if you anger them.
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A
female
reader, cattycakes  +, writes (19 May 2014):
Don't get tied in knots. He asked you to text him. Guys get nervous too you know. Perhaps he wanted you to have space to change your mind. He invited you, so that's fine isn't it? There is no problem here. He may be shy, the fact that he asked you says he likes you. Men do not speak like us. Don't look for what he says, but what he does. This etiquette on texting makes no sense and people seem to get offended all the time...for nothing! Text the poor boy and put him out of his misery. And remember not to get offended if it takes a day or so or him to get back to you. That is what they are like.
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