A
female
age
51-59,
*y first Clue
writes:I have been with "Bill" for 7 months... We were very close .. close to the point he was going to move in till I pushed him to many times..Meaning, I would tell him not to come back..(past relationships made walls real high with me).. He lived about 45 min away... within 2 weeks after he said it was over he moved to my area...right around the corner. when asked why, he said for a lot of reasons, but it was not because of me. ok back up here..we never stopped talking..I met his son he would come and say on weekends and he became very close to my children. Ok the question.. He will not refer to us as in a "relationship" though we have worked things out..I see him almost every day...talk to him everyday.. he tells me he loves me.. but not sure he is in love with me..tells me he has not seen anyone else...yes we have sex.. I have NO clue what I am to him.. a friend? someone he just is seeing..? are we in a relationship? what am I..other then the obvious..."stupid" ? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, njthompson +, writes (26 June 2008):
I am confused and need some help. I have been with the guy for 17 yrs. We have a 13 yr. old daughter together. We have a house together. A couple of weekks ago, he told me I love you to death, but it's over. He swears there is no one else. I have no reason to believe that there is. There is no signs. He doesn't want me to move out. He wanted me to get a job, I did and it still didn't work.
Today he told me is all I want is SEX from you. Out SEX live is the best. What do you think is going on?
A
female
reader, pepper27  +, writes (14 June 2008):
 Hi Hunny
He is going to be as peter said testing the waters to see how things go, Hunny I more than understand what you mean with the emotional walls..I have ptss and have for 10yrs I have had a really tough time getting into relationships in the past as Id always say GO! At the first slightest thing that maybe someone said and it reminded me of the past to the point of actually having flashbacks...Im currently going through a really bad time with it at this moment love, Past memorys can ruin futour good ones sweetheart Im working with councellors and I look up on the web anything that can help me get through and over that wall...In my mind if I dont fight this then he is still winning...Hunny I would give yourself some time, And read some stuff that will help you heal....
http://www.womensselfesteem.com/index.html
If you have been in previous bad relationships mine were Particularly cruel and clever very abusive so hunny this is why I think he wont commit to anything just yet..You can heal hunny just take it slow and read as much as you can to help yourself that link is a good one it covers so much, 20 minutes a day and your strength and confidence will be so much more alive, I hope things work out for you hunny if you need a chat at any time message me Im only to happy to help..TAKE CARE OF YOU WITH LOTS OF LOVE N HUGS MANDY XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 June 2008): No you're certainly not stupid.It sounds like you two would make a good couple,not only because you guys live so close and children are friends,but you guys seem to not be able to stay away from each other.Try to make it work out between you two.
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A
female
reader, supermum +, writes (14 June 2008):
 ask lol... thats thee only thing that you can do! sorry i couldnt be more helpful
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A
male
reader, PeterPan +, writes (14 June 2008):
 My first "off the cuff" response to this is that you've made him gun-shy. He's probably testing the waters with you and not necessarily trying to get a friends with benefits out of you, but he's probably feeling somewhat cautious about completely opening up to you... that's one possibility...
It's a bit puzzling that he would move so close to "ground zero" and be in your immediate neighborhood though. That kind of says to me that he's open to a relationship with you (declared and all), but is apprehensive about making the final "commit".
Have you asked him what's going on or how he sees the two of you?
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