A
female
age
36-40,
*arkeyedgirl
writes:My boyfriend of six months broke up with me. He told me not to worry because we'd always be friends. He was working in the next town over at the time and had planned on moving back but the break up just came back, got his stuff from his place and left, and wouldn't find time to come and say goodbye. He would never let me come talk to him, and wouldn't come and say goodbye when he moved home to Germany. When I asked him if honestly there was even a single thing about me he missed he said "there is nothing I miss."Then I shut my facebook down and I got an angry letter from him. "You removed me from facebook??!! Fine, have fun then."I didn't remove him, I just was no longer online, but he got the impression that I had. Why was he so hurt?In the end he was a really, really immature person. He's been dumped a lot of times for doing dumb things like forgetting birthdays and cheating, but always tried very hard to be wonderful to me.Being so immature, I guess my question would be do you think deep down he DID miss me and was just coping by blocking it out? Was he just trying to get over me? My sister had an experience where an ex came out of the blue after a year and told her he suddenly missed her incredibly, like some sort of delayed mourning period.Could this be the same? Did I actually matter at all to him if he treated me so coldy after we broke up? Or was he just immature and blocking me out?Do you think he misses me?
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broke up, facebook, immature, period Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Lola1 +, writes (25 June 2010):
 Here's a first. I disagree with big ron. Anyone who agrees with me is a wise and mature human-being (joke). Actually, the fact that big ron can admit he still loves his ex, seems "in touch with his feelings" to me, but here I will contradict myself and say that I also AGREE with big ron when he says that those who call each other names, still care.
If we didn't, we wouldn't be inspired to react with anger, such as, "You're a wretched whore," or "You removed me from facebook??!! Fine, have fun then."
Healing from a broken heart is a process. Try not to over analyze things too much and move forward. You ARE better off, even if it doesn't feel like it now.
A
female
reader, Lola1 +, writes (24 June 2010):
If we said he missed you, what would that give you? What would change for you?
He missed you well enough to notice you deleted him from facebook. Facebook doesn't notify people that they are no longer on someone's friend's list - you have to look for them.
He missed you well enough to want to remain friends and have a connection to you via the internet, where he could kind of keep tabs on you from afar.
Maybe he couldn't say good-bye because he is not grown-up enough to face you, yet, but all of the above changes nothing.
Sad as it is, it is over.
It is good for you he thinks you deleted him from facebook and not that without him your whole world fell apart and you isolated yourself from the world. Let him think you are moving on without a care.
Let him wonder what YOU are thinking and why YOU did what you did (delete him, etc.) for a change.
Good luck, hun. Big hugs.
x
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (24 June 2010):
Nope, I don't. I do think he likes the attention and I think he likes to have his ego stroked. He treated you coldly, and that's what matters here. Nothing else. Let him go.
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