A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Ok i like this guy and i was talking to his friend and i told him that i liked his friend and that i gave him my number. Well i havent heard from him and been almost a month and we still email each another on myspace when hes on which is veryly rarely like tonight was the first time hes been on since april 14 i mean he doesnt get on very often and i want to get to know him.So i was talking to his friend the other night and he told me that i have to puruse him and that he isnt one to think of himself highly enough to pursue a girl....What does that mean? how to i puruse him? He comes off shy so i dont know and the only time i hear from him is when he emails me back on my emails but hes very brief with his emails.I kind of feel like he doesnt know what to say and shy. I commented one of his pix saying that i think hes a cutie and that it was my fav pix and he put it up as his default pix on myspace. I was the only one who commented that pix. Its like pulling teeth. Its like pulling teeth for him to be more talkactive and i think it be alot easier if he just called me or texted me but i dont know and i dont have his number either. But he has mine. What should i do?How to puruse him?
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male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (3 May 2008):
 It means he lacks confidence, it takes a lot to approach a girl especially if you been shot down a couple of times. If you never even once had the courage to ask, then it gets even worse over the years.
You gain confidence by dating but to date you need confidence. Catch-22.
But aren't you experiencing just how hard it is to be the one who has to take the initiative? Well he is feeling the same way possibly made worse by a bad dating history. If he even has one.
You might also have to accept that he just ain't interested. Either in you personally or in women in general. He could be gay or have a low sex drive even be a-sexual.
But his friends reason might be all there is too it, it is getting more common. Guys who remain virgins because they just don't have the confidence to go out there and approach women or men for that matter.
As to how to approach him, well be friends first. Just keep trying and he might eventually get the clue that this girl will not shoot him down if he tries talking to her.
A
male
reader, cp5lb +, writes (3 May 2008):
Maybe he's turned off by poor punctuation or run-on sentences.
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