A
female
age
30-35,
*harr09
writes:I need some help.Last summer i was seeing this lad who is 4 years older than me for a few months, we got together, but because of the age gap it never went anywhere and we stopped talking.This January we got together properly, our relationship is perfect. He makes me so happy and gives me everything i want, but recently i found out that during the period we stopped talkin he slept with another girl and she's now pregnant. I tried to speak to him and he gets really annoyed about it, and asks me to wait and see what happens, he claims she's 'been around a bit' and isn't sure weather it's true.I know what i want in life. Me and him have spent many nights speaking about what we want together in the future, how many kids, at what age... and are certain we want to be together for the rest of out lives, only i don't feel i could carry on knowing he has another child out there.If the baby is his, the girl has said to me she does not want him anywhere near the baby, but i think that's wrong!Do you think i'm being selfish not wanting to continue our relationship and do you think it's the right thing for me to do, as i know it will break my heart getting over him?!Please help!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 May 2009): Do you really want to go through this over and over again in your head? You should not feel guilty for dropping him as it's his own fault for not covering up. If the child is his it will be a part of his life for ever and ever. I suspect that your future talks did not involve a love baby from another relationship. Most men get angry when confronted and it kinda seems like they put themselves in a corner and choose between anger or tears. Woman choose tears men choose anger hmmmm. Anyway what ever your decision make sure he gets tested to see if he is the daddy asap that way you know where you stand and can rethink your future talks
A
female
reader, Olivia(Y). +, writes (12 May 2009):
 Relationships can work like this.
He has a right to have contact with his child after all it takes two people to make a child.
You can still make this relationship work, you can have kids with him and be together for life the only difference is that he will have to make time for his other child aswel. You can form a relationship with this child aswel because you will be a part of their life if you are with their dad.
Don't split with the love of your life just because he has another child, it won't stop you from living your dream to have a family, he will still love you and your children will have a step- brother or sister.
Good luck
Livia
xoxox
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