A
male
age
36-40,
*assage
writes:Dear Cupid,It's been a while since I fell in love or had that feeling of desire to be with someone.I think it's probably I am in a new enviorement as I moved to a new country. but I miss that feeling of love, attraction, chemistry, and adventure.I think I felt that in High school but now it has been a while...Is it due to hormone changes as I got older? why do I view love differenlty?Is it because I am focusing on work and building my future?I don't like sleeping around neither, I don't do it to feed my needs I feel like I want to do it with the right person but at the same time the set up of my life is not ready to include somebody else...I fear I don't meet their expectations when I havent met mine in the first place...
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (12 November 2013):
 You said yourself "i'm focusing on work and building my future"
and that in a nutshell is it...
I know this sounds sexist but I've noted that men (in general) cannot handle more than ONE big project at a time.
Women tend to multi-task much better than men do for some reason (IN GENERAL not always)
I was rather worried about my son for a bit he was so NOT interested in dating or women... now at 27 he's finally got a career he's happy with and is finding his way and that is including a new GF.... some folks are just late bloomers...
A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (11 November 2013):
I went through a stage around your age where I felt the same. I didn't really think I wanted to put in the effort to make a relationship work, and I didn't want a fwb relationship either, so I persisted off of the occasional hook up. I occasionally went on dates to test the waters but it never amounted to much.
I felt a little lonely, but I was okay because I had a number of relationships prior to this time and I didn't miss what I had then. Finally I met my wife and decided I was ready to be in a relationship again.
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (11 November 2013):
 You get practical and you learn that love is so much more than hormones and impulses. Most people try to make mind adjustments but others demand that love happen to them even when they are not at the right place. I think being flexible is what makes people happier. The world needs more people like you so that the women won't feel used by men who can't offer them anything besides sex.
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