A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi,About 4 years ago I met this guy and we went out for a few weeks. I was a bit dubious about going out with him because he was 8 years younger than me, but he seemed charming so i thought what the hell, age is just a number! Anyway he was really nice at first, taking me out for drinks and meals and then we slept together. We carried on seeing each other but the nights out stoppped because he said he was a bit short of cash. Then I noticed his behaviour changing a bit. He was less chatty and a bit moody. He also started calling less and only paying me short visits. Eventually he stood me up one night so I finished things with him. Ater I finished with him, through people who knew him I started hearing all these stories about him. Apparently he had had a fling with a wealthy woman who was 30 years his senior. I coldn't believe that him, a good looking 22 year old would have slept with a 50 something woman. Anyway over the last 4 years we have got back together a few times and he has always denied the rumours that I have heard about him saing it was just gossipers. Every time we have got back together, it has always ended the same way. After a few weeks hes stopped calling and then arranged something and not turned up so i have ended up finishing things with him.Hes now 26 and a few weeks back he got to contact out of the blue again and asked if he could see me. I told him that there was too much water under the bridge, he had lied too many times and he would only do the same again. he texted for a while, jokey, fun texts and then all of a sudden disappeared off the radar again.I've been doing a bit of research on the nternet and I'm not starting to think that he could have some sort of personality disorder!Hes never stayed in a job more than 6 months, he tells lies about stupid things and exagerates all the time. He does horible thngs like cuts you off in telephone conversations and doesn't turn up for dates over and over again. He also picks women up and drops them all the time. H also still lives with his parents and I've heard he treats his Mum like dirt too!What do you think. I know i should just forget this guy but its like i'm trying to understand what makes him tick nd want to now if when he gets back in touch he is just trying to con me and he is messing me around for kicks....
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male
reader, gayuncleandy  +, writes (27 April 2008):
 He is neither conning you or messing you around for kicks, he is just being himself. You need to stop leading him on and tell him what you think and stop being so damn curious about his behavior. You obviously don't love him, so leave it for someone who does to iron out his kinks.
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