A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have posted on this site earlier about my relationship with my ex-bf. To sum it up, we were together for two and a half years, lived together for one and a half. I moved to a new city for my Ph.D and we broke up cause it was more important for him to party and hang out with his friends than to ever come visit me. I was the one who travelled seven hours every weekend. Anyway, I found out later that he'd cheated and lied with many different girls while we lived together. So this past month I saw him a few times- even slept with him- of which I am very ashamed! Well, I was visiting friends in his city and we talked- actually he was the one who asked me to come since it would be the last time we would hang out before I went away on a month long holiday. The thing that annoys me is that he insists on cuddling and kissing and then says he's just cares about me as a friend. I asked him Sunday night about 'us' and he told me I needed to move on, that we are incompatible etc. The thing I don't understand is that even though I don't like him as a person and don't want to really be with him, I am so sad. Is it being rejected? Loneliness? I don't know. Am stopping all contact now, but wish I could just get over it. 10 months is too long for feeling like crap over someone who never cared/ respected me.
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2008): I agree with pepper27.
10months is far to long. 10 months of pain - I know that all to well. Its awful. And it needs to stop before it gets out of control and destroys your life.
You need to avoid contact, and get comfort elsewhere. If he was with other people and keeps saying he cares and all that, its a bit obvious he was playing with you. He just swings from one person to the other when they appear.
It's horrible. But your better than that. Cut it off, and be with someone that you can be with, just you and him and still get your PhD.
Good luck with that by the way - lots of hard work but a rewarding future!
A
female
reader, pepper27  +, writes (1 July 2008):
 Hi Hunny
You were with a game player sweetheart, He messed around behind your back and treated you like crap..But he is the one thats lucked out this is how you look at this..You did nothing wrong he did. He did not respect you or care about your feelings at all. You are well rid of this person who has made you feel this way. You are certainly worth more than this and you must never forget that. Forget him if he were to contact you again you really canot be bothered with him get your control back start feeling more possitive about who you as a person. A good kind person who gave someone the very best she could and he did not appreciate your kind loving nature so therefor does not deserve you anyway. There is someone out there who does and he is the lucky guy who will one day get you..Dont feel rejected by someone who has no thought for anyone but themselves sweetheart, You are worth so very much more than this. You have a holiday coming up good times to be had so go and have some really good fun and forget this person who will be doing the same boring crap he has been doing for yrs...You have so much ahead of you that sounds so possitive and good, This feeling will pass just belive in you always and no in your heart he did not deserve you at all TAKE CARE HUNNY WITH LOVE N HUGS MANDY XXXXXXXXXXX
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