A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I was dating a guy for 9 months. He has just come out of an on off 2 year relationship with a girl who tried every trick in the book to get him back. He ended up sleeping with her a number of times when we were seeing each other, but each time, told me it was a mistake he did not want her but he cared for her and found it hard to let go (especially as they had been though a lot together). Each time I took him back as he started to open up more to me, told me he loved me and even talked of a future. When his ex threatened to move overseas, he ended up taking her on a mini break (he says it was to say goodbye). She emailed me to gloat and at that point I ended it for good. We did meet up a few weeks after breaking up to say goodbye (now it was my turn to move overseas), he was very upset but when I suggested we keep in touch, he refused. This has hurt me, especially as he has kept in touch with each and every single one of his exes. It makes me think he never ever cared about me. I was there for him too, but he has not checked up once to see how I am doing. And now, when I send a text to see how he is (he recently lost his job) his responses are so cold, as if he hates me?! I didnt do anything wrong?? The thing is I am still very much in love with him, and I believe he felt something too but am I kidding myself?
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female
reader, hlskitten +, writes (9 August 2008):
 This was a non starter from the off. The guy didn't know what he wanted, sleeping with her, going on mini breaks, its all tosh. You dont need to take an ex on a mini break to say goodbye. Because you loved him, he played you like a fiddle. He has done you a big favour not keeping in touch cuz you know you want more than mates status.
But he's a mixed up individual and will probably be so up himself that he will be thinking it was you with the problem. Yes you had a problem, but that problem was him the stoopid fool.
Find someone that treats you better.
C xxxxxx
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2008): you did absolutely nothing wrong. he should have let go and he didnt. you just ended it before you could get hurt evenmore. if he is behaving horribly then let him. he wants to believe its all your fault and its not. i know its hard but you will meet someone who will make you happy - will fulfill YOUR needs and not their EX-GIRLFRIENDS needs. let him be and carry on with your life.
hope this helped
xxxxxxxxx
luv z
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