A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:i am in love with this guy i meet. i don't know how he feels about me and i haven't told him how i feel. we both flirt with each other. however, i dont know if he does this with all the girls, as ever since we have met we having been doing this. it's been 6 months now and i dont want to take a risk because he is a really good friend of mine.sometimes i feel that there is no hope because he doesn't reply to my calls and it goes all cold between us. i have been there for him when he has had few personal problems. but i feel that i'm not always getting the same back. my friends tell me that does like me, but he is just shy, but im not sure anymore. what shall i do?
View related questions:
flirt, shy Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 January 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI still do not have the courage to tell him how I feel. Things are bit more complicated. He is changing jobs which means he will have to move away for a couple of years and I am still studying. I have 6 months left of my course. We are both in same profession so he completely understands the pressure of the course i'm undertaking.
If he gets a job away from home, we will move within a couple of months. But i have my exams in between now and then. So we cannot really see each other until after. But that then means that we will only have about a month or two together if we do start a relationship. I feel really down when he tells me that he is succeeding in finding a job, I dont want to get in the way of his happiness. there is no chance of me going with him, upon completing this course, due to other reasons.
I feel that i do need to tell him something before he goes, if he goes, but that wont be until over a month.
If you could suggest anything, that would be great.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 January 2007): Im not sure if i can help you any but I can totally sympathise with your situation. I like this guy at uni n im not sure if he likes me.
I say trust your instincts. If you feel that he likes you then he probably does. Its easy to tell if you have chemistry with someone. I think the problem here is that either he isnt sure he wants to take it further or he isnt sure if you like him back.
As i have discovered the only way to solve this situation is to be blunt and ask him. If this has been going on for 6 months, it could go on for another 6 months. Assuming you're both single theres no real reason for you not to be together.
I know you're scared but if you dont ask him you'll just keep fretting and worrying and reading extra meaning into every little thing he says or text he sends (trust me I know that you do! I've done it too)And this could go on forever!
Be brave and just come out with it. I'm going to do it too. Choose the right moment just say that you like him. Dont tell him you love him straight away, but just tell him you like him and see what he thinks of that.
Hope this helps I know its a little long, just as much for myself as for you really! Good luck
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 January 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwe dont have any mutual friends only the people we worked with. I was only on a work placement and no longer work there and i never kept in contact with the others. we have tried to meet many times but something always happens, it usually him cancelling because of work or something.he says all the right things but he also hurts me. but he doesnt know that he hurts me. i think its because my feelings for him are so strong that anything he does wrong hurts, when it could be purely innocent.
...............................
A
male
reader, Dazzerg  +, writes (17 January 2007):
 I think we all flirt a little. The thing about flirting is that it doesnt mean alot in and of itself. Its possible that this guy has real feelings for you and that the 'cold' periods are when he gets scared of that. It is certainly possible for the most outrageous flirts to become totally introverted when confronted with real feelings.
Are your friends mutual friends?? Would it be possible to arrange an outing within a circle of friends but where you were both present. I think you need to think about moving this situation forward so you know where you stand.
...............................
|
