A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi, my man used to cum in me, using condoms, all the time. For the past 2 months this has not been happening - hes been blaming this on his night work, hes tired, if we argue this is the problem, its the dog etc. I have tried my best, but only managed to get him to do this himself over me. Im 34 and have never had a man do this to me. He maintains an erections but tries so hard to cum, it always end in failure. I think I'm the problem - hes says he fancies me like mad, but says he can masturbate on his own (about me!) but cannot get there with me. Am I being taken for a ride? Im 34, hes 53. PS I have even brought him bondage gear as he mentioned it recently but thats not helping. Eveything was fine until 2 months ago - do you think he has just gone off me but too scared to tell me?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, satindesire  +, writes (23 October 2009):
 The more YOU worry about it, the more HE'LL worry about it. If you relax and enjoy sex and not make it all about the orgasm, eventually his ability to orgasm will come back.
He's freaking out enough on his own without you adding to it. Don't stress out, it's nothing to worry about and happens to everyone occasionally.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy + ♥, writes (23 October 2009):
No, you are not the problem at all, and you mustn't think that because it will make this problem worse for him. He's stressed, which can have a terrible effect on a man. So rather than focusing on him coming, focus on getting close and helping each other relax. The more he tries to force it, the more it won't happen.
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