A
female
age
41-50,
*omeonjesusthishurtstoomuch
writes:Hello i am an obsessive co-dependent in love with a narcissistic. I am a kind loving person but try to also control everything.(so no one gets hurt) Anyway my question to everyone is how can i stop letting him hurt me? He couldn't care less while i'm busting myself to do everything. I don't want pity but i do want help. I feel worthless inside. Any advice would be much needed. Anyone familiar with love addictions / codependency? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, comeonjesusthishurtstoomuch +, writes (15 February 2011):
comeonjesusthishurtstoomuch is verified as being by the original poster of the question thank you very much ladies i know that you are both right. I know also that i can't fix/change someone who doesn't care. It is like a drug i pray i can stop.
A
female
reader, OhGetReal +, writes (13 February 2011):
 This is a very toxic relationship for you, a very bad combination, and the reason why you feel worthless inside.The help you need is to cut all contact with this psychopath and get into therapy ASAP.I don't buy into the co-dependent theory, but you may suffer from an anxiety disorder that you try to control by controlling your eternal environment and others. Being with an unpredictable narcissistic personality disordered person would make the most stable person on the planet anxious at best.You probably also have other issues and personaltiy traits that draw you to these types of men and you have got to become aware of this in order to stop the bleeding.I don't work for this website, but a lot of help for you can be found at saferelationshipsmagazine.com Read Sandra Says articles, purchase Women Who Love Psychopaths e-book to educate yourself on personality disorder and why you are prone to become involved with those types.
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A
female
reader, sharlou17  +, writes (13 February 2011):
 Hi there...
And yes i am very familiar with the type of addictive relationship your talking about...
This is very very difficult as in these type of relationships the 'rollercoaster' is quite impossible to get off...or so it seems
All i can say is this...And its gonna be very hard for you...You need to get out of it...Get off the rollercoaster once and for all before it destroys your mental health...Im afraid if he has NPD he most likely will never change its really sad but true...And this is the pattern its gonna be for a long time...Ask yourself is this what you want for yourself for the longterm? Is it worth it? Or are you worth more ? These are very important questions...
Its going to be very hard at first like coming off of a drug or something but im afraid its your only option...Unless you just cant live without him and are willing to endure all the pain...But is that an option for you ?...
Anyway im sorry I cant be more help...Start thinking of you...
I wish you strength and luck...
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